Search found 10322 matches
- Wed Apr 24, 2024 5:00 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
A mother takes her four year old daughter into the bank and the little girl goes up to the counter and says " as I now have a job I would like to open a bank account" the manager replies oh what sort of a job do you have?" The little girl replies " I have a job on a building site...
- Wed Apr 24, 2024 4:57 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
A woman says to her doctor doctor "I have two green marks on the inside of my thighs" The doctor had a look and said. "Is your boyfriend a Gypsy?"
I said "Yes, why?"
He said, "Tell him his earrings aren't real gold."
I said "Yes, why?"
He said, "Tell him his earrings aren't real gold."
- Wed Apr 24, 2024 4:55 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Men. Examine your own prostate by simply wiping your arse with Aldi value toilet roll.
- Wed Apr 24, 2024 4:55 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
The wife was getting dressed up for a night out with her mates, walked into the lounge and asked me to rate her.
"8 or 9 at least." I said.
"Out of 10?" she smiled... "Thanks, Babe, I'm flattered."
Didn't have the heart to tell her I meant pints.
"8 or 9 at least." I said.
"Out of 10?" she smiled... "Thanks, Babe, I'm flattered."
Didn't have the heart to tell her I meant pints.
- Tue Apr 23, 2024 10:38 pm
- Forum: On the Terraces
- Topic: Chavski cocks H Tue 23rd April KO 8pm
- Replies: 386
- Views: 3351
Re: Chavski cocks H Tue 23rd April KO 8pm
Brilliant, my youngest brother and I going mental, said to him after the second goal we can score four or five, we could have got seven
- Tue Apr 23, 2024 4:41 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
I've just bought a house with old period features.
She fucking hates it when I call her that.
She fucking hates it when I call her that.
- Tue Apr 23, 2024 4:41 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Wife texts husband at work on a cold winters morning: "
Windows frozen."
Husband texts back: "Pour some lukewarm water over it"
Wife texts back: "Computer completely fucked now."
Windows frozen."
Husband texts back: "Pour some lukewarm water over it"
Wife texts back: "Computer completely fucked now."
- Tue Apr 23, 2024 4:11 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Glad you like them guys
- Mon Apr 22, 2024 6:13 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
I'm not saying you should totally distrust the internet, but there's a huge discrepancy between the number of iPads I've won,
and the number of iPads i own
and the number of iPads i own
- Mon Apr 22, 2024 6:13 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
What they should really say on those cooking shows: "Hello and welcome to 'Pointless Cooking That Has Nothing To Do With Anyone's Actual Life'. Today, we are making a very complicated recipe, using ingredients you don't have, utensils you've never heard of, and in a kitchen that is bigger than ...
- Mon Apr 22, 2024 6:12 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Jokes about sugar are rare.
Jokes about brown sugar - Demerara.
Jokes about brown sugar - Demerara.
- Mon Apr 22, 2024 6:11 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
When employing someone, gather all the C.V.s together and randomly split them into two piles.
Take one pile and throw it in the bin.
This stops you employing anyone unlucky.
Take one pile and throw it in the bin.
This stops you employing anyone unlucky.
- Mon Apr 22, 2024 6:09 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Me and the wife have just been to the cinema to see that film Suffragette.
Two hours of a woman's struggle........full of tears, aggression, sadness, anger and frustration.
Anyway, after she finally managed to park the car we rushed in and caught the credits...
Two hours of a woman's struggle........full of tears, aggression, sadness, anger and frustration.
Anyway, after she finally managed to park the car we rushed in and caught the credits...
- Mon Apr 22, 2024 6:08 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Car of the year 2024 as voted for by the readers of Women's Own is..........
A blue one!!
A blue one!!
- Mon Apr 22, 2024 6:07 pm
- Forum: The Cannonballs
- Topic: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
- Replies: 3271
- Views: 686058
Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
"You will always remember this day as the happiest day of your life"
"But the Wedding is not until tomorrow dad"
"I know, son"
"But the Wedding is not until tomorrow dad"
"I know, son"