Let's All Laugh At Man Utd! (Merged thread)

[TurnipMasher]

Captain Shrek. That's a large insult to the little boy inside.

[DB10GOONER]

Captain Shrek. That's a large insult to the little boy inside.

For that one game or permanently? Christ, if it's permanent they'll have to provide a translator. Also, if it's permanent then what a fantastic kick in the vagina for VanJudasCunt.

[OneBardGooner]

So Good News all round then!

melt face vangaalcunt has dropped the ball already !

[Bradywasking]

There seems to be an air of inevitability with the media and Man Ure supporters that the arrival of Van Gaal means automatic success. They will improve on last season but as for winning the league I think they are too far behind as a starting point to catch City or Chelsea. I think top four for them so who drops out ?
Some of Van Gaal's pre season comments sounded to me like getting his excuses in early. He is a realist and maybe he knows that expectations are too high, especially with the broader fan base that never had to support a team in decline or experience more than the odd season without success.
As for the captaincy , RVJ must have felt that his ex international manager would look favourably on him for the armband.

[augie]

Captain Shrek. That's a large insult to the little boy inside.

He had no option really - anything other than appointing shrek would have seen the fat scouse c*nt have an absolute meltdown and would have resulted in some loyalty issues within the squad. If I was a player in that squad and had just seen plastic face give the captaincy to fellow dutchman rvp, then I would certainly be worried and would def keep my distance from rvp in case stories were brought back to the manager - I know that could still happen anyway, but to appoint his pet as club captain would have set the alarm bells ringing for me

[donaldo]

LVG has spent nearly two months with RVP during the summer doesnt anyone think he hasnt spoke to RVP about the captaincy?

[1989]

This surely is doomed for failure. Shrek is never a captain in a million years.

[DB10GOONER]

This surely is doomed for failure. Shrek is never a captain in a million years.

Can you imagine the first time you disagreed with him during training? You'd go out to the car park afterwards and your hubcaps would be fucking missing.

And there'd be some old granny's soiled knickers tied around your steering wheel.

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

This surely is doomed for failure. Shrek is never a captain in a million years.

I disagree,the bloke is a top player and never gives less than his all, he also encourages those around him and drives the team on

[clockender1]

This surely is doomed for failure. Shrek is never a captain in a million years.

yup.

being made captain might motivate him in August, but in December when the lovely Colleen and all his showbiz mates are downing cocktails on the beach in barbados, watch that weight balloon and his effort sag.

It also tells the quality of their squad that Darren Fletcher.Darren. Fletcher....is VC.

VG is hamstrung by that massive pay deal Rooney is on - 300,000 a week. he can't drop Rooney, nor is there any buyers out there - Fergie was out of his mind to give him that.

so far VG has added attacking talent in midfield but done nothing in DM or CB. With another injury to RvP they could miss out on 4th.

i bet they still stuff us up there though

[1989]

It was lord Moyes who gave him the 300k a week wages. Legend.

[DB10GOONER]

It was lord Moyes who gave him the 300k a week wages. Legend.

Agent Moyes - the gift that never stops giving.

[clockender1]

It was lord Moyes who gave him the 300k a week wages. Legend.

even better.

[northbank123]

Captaincy isn't going to 'motivate' Rooney more than that bumper contract he is sitting on for the next 4 years.

He just isn't captain material. Like Suarez, he is the sort of player whose performances are capable of inspiring and lifting other players, but this applies regardless of whether or not he's captain. Just speaks volumes to the lack of suitable candidates in their squad.

[clockender1]

i see their brand new 30million defender has just been ruled out for 4/5 weeks with a hammy. nasty.