Official Joke Thread... unless someone gets offended...

[DB10GOONER]

A spuds supporting couple walking out of the divorce court, the wife is crying her heart out.

Husband says ' Oh for fuck's sake stop crying, you're still my sister'

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My ex-wife asked what reincarnation is. I explained, when you die you come back as something else.

She said she wanted to come back as a pig.

I said, 'You're not fucking listening'


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Was depressed last night, rang lifeline. Got a call centre in Afghanistan , told them I was suicidal.

They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

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I am going to watch my wedding video in reverse later. I love the part where she takes her ring off and

walks down the isle backwards, gets in the car and fucks off.

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A woman in labour, shouting and screaming as usual, 'Get this out of me, give me drugs!'.

She turns to the boyfriend and says 'You did this to me you fucker'.

He replies casually, 'If you remember, I wanted to stick it up your arse but you said, 'Fuck off it'll be too painful', Now who's laughing?'

[northbankbren]

[Galasso]

Nice DB10 I like the way you stick a stinker in there just so that we appreicate the others more.

[gus ceasar is a legend]

This kind of thing has to stop!

The first joke is sexist!

The second is pigist!

The third promotes suicide bombing through the medium of call centres!

The fourth mocks the holiest of unions, marriage and so therefore is blasphemous!

And the last one condones the use of drugs during childbirth with against my beliefs as a practising Scientologist!


OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!!!!

[rodders999]

The Mary Whitehouse brigade are going to be all over those like a RASH!!

[Mrs Gus (Doris)]

Put a warning on so that Quartz and Basil don't get offended!!!

[Gooner1315]

Quality

[Cockerill's chin]

[Goonanana]

Was depressed last night, rang lifeline. Got a call centre in Afghanistan , told them I was suicidal.

They got all excited and asked if I could drive a truck.

Lol genius!

I think we need to find some kind of medium ground on this joke thing - look what happens to us when Arsenal don't play we just start in fighting!!

Although no doubt Mrs Gus's suggestion was extracting the urine it might not be a bad idea to perhaps have small warnings on joke threads so they dont get taken away all together E.g joke thread S/H would be contains sexist and homophopic

That way if you don't like that dont look at it! If we lose our jokes altogether however we become like the main site!

And please no one try and change the world and say no-one should be looking at that stuff blah blah, this is an Arsenal forum not a place to change the world

[rodders999]

I think we should all hold hands and make daisy chains. Then there would be no need for any in fighting.

[REB]

hope no one complains db10

but some good uns there

[Wayno]

Funny jokes DB10 but I suggest this thread be deleted because they are not really Asenal related and a few of the regulars may be offended by the ridiculing of suicide bombers.

[ds]

Sorry but suicide bomber is one of the funniest, I'm sure I'll upset some with that remark but hey wtf

[REB]

ok flash, post deleted





laughted my tits off with this one

woman in labour, shouting and screaming as usual, 'Get this out of me, give me drugs!'.

She turns to the boyfriend and says 'You did this to me you fucker'.

He replies casually, 'If you remember, I wanted to stick it up your arse but you said, 'Fuck off it'll be too painful', Now who's laughing?'

[flash gunner]

ok flash, post deleted

You bastard