LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

It's all a load of Cannonballs in here! This is the virtual Arsenal pub where you can chat about anything except football. Be warned though, like any pub, the content may not always be suitable for everyone.
LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Fri Mar 09, 2018 9:28 pm

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
Cheers Joe :barscarf:


Not sure if women have a sense of humour btw although they can multitask so maybe tell her the feminist joke while she is ironing :lol:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Tue Mar 13, 2018 7:51 am

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
They don't need one Joe. They have vaginas which are pretty sweet. 8)

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Tue Mar 13, 2018 8:28 pm

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
They don't need one Joe. They have vaginas which are pretty sweet. 8)
And sometimes metallic :shock: :lol:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Wed Mar 14, 2018 7:13 am

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
They don't need one Joe. They have vaginas which are pretty sweet. 8)
And sometimes metallic :shock: :lol:
:shock:

:coffeespit:

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OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby OneBardGooner » Fri Mar 16, 2018 3:31 pm

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
Does the Pope have a Vagina!?

Excellent work there LFG...


Ere how did you know about the used condom incident!? :shock: :lol:

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Fri Mar 16, 2018 3:47 pm

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
Does the Pope have a Vagina!?

Excellent work there LFG...


Ere how did you know about the used condom incident!? :shock: :lol:
:oops:

Spuddy told me about one such event :shock: :lol:

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DB10GOONER
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Fri Mar 16, 2018 6:03 pm

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
Does the Pope have a Vagina!?

Excellent work there LFG...


Ere how did you know about the used condom incident!? :shock: :lol:
:oops:

Spuddy told me about one such event :shock: :lol:
Don't joke about that mate. He nearly choked to death on that condom. :lol: :wink:

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Fri Mar 16, 2018 7:18 pm

Top, top work as always.

I'm looking forward to trying the 'feminist' ones on the wife. Do women have a sense of humour?
Does the Pope have a Vagina!?

Excellent work there LFG...


Ere how did you know about the used condom incident!? :shock: :lol:
:oops:

Spuddy told me about one such event :shock: :lol:
Don't joke about that mate. He nearly choked to death on that condom. :lol: :wink:
:lol: :lol:

I can't find the coffee spit emoticon otherwise that would have had one :lol:

Poor old spudster :lol:

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OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby OneBardGooner » Sat Mar 17, 2018 12:28 pm

Worst of all I heard the condom he half-swallowed was full of someone else's man juice! :shock: :ewwwww:

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corkbarry
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby corkbarry » Sun Mar 18, 2018 11:51 pm

Image

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OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby OneBardGooner » Mon Apr 02, 2018 9:44 am

So Good I had to post it Twice!

Just watch and wait. :D :wink:


https://twitter.com/twitter/statuses/979825063263457280



:lol:

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Sat Apr 21, 2018 8:37 am

Apparently, BBC flagship programme Newsnight is going to hire Pippa Middleton, Kate's younger sister, as a news correspondent.

Which just goes to show you that if you work hard, get straight As and go to journalism school ...

you'll lose your dream job to a woman whose sister's married a Prince.

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Sat Apr 21, 2018 8:55 am

Neil Armstrong lands on the moon: 5 pictures.

Girl goes to Starbucks : 47 pictures.

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Sat Apr 21, 2018 8:57 am

The toothbrush was invented in Norfolk.

Anywhere else, it would've been called a teethbrush.

LeftfootlegendGooner
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Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Sat Apr 21, 2018 9:00 am

I went into the bank and walked up to the lady at the desk and said, "I want to open a fucking bank account." "Excuse me, what did you say ?" she replied. "I said I want to open a FUCKING bank account." "I'm willing to help you," she said, "But if you keep using that kind of language I'll have to get the manager over here." "Why, because i want to open a fucking back account ?" The lady had it and stormed off the the back to get the manager. She came back with the bank manager and he said to me, "Sir, what seems to be the problem ?" I said to him,
"The problem is that I just want to open up a fucking bank account here for £900,000." The manager replied, "Oh, and is this cunnt giving you a hard time !"


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