LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

It's all a load of Cannonballs in here! This is the virtual Arsenal pub where you can chat about anything except football. Be warned though, like any pub, the content may not always be suitable for everyone.
User avatar
DB10GOONER
Posts: 46498
Joined: Tue Jan 16, 2007 2:06 pm
Location: Dublin, Ireland.
Contact:

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Wed Aug 01, 2018 12:27 pm


Quote OneBardGooner

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

As always Great work LFG :barscarf: :hail:
Ahhhh back when there was love between the Ewok and Dwarf races.... :D :wink:

LeftfootlegendGooner
Posts: 7995
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Wed Aug 01, 2018 4:19 pm

My wife said to me that holiday sex is definitely the best.

That's the worst postcard I've ever had tbf.
:lol:

Poor old Finsbury Park Gooner..... :lol: :wink:
:lol:

I think that joke was made for him :lol:

LeftfootlegendGooner
Posts: 7995
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Wed Aug 01, 2018 4:21 pm


Quote OneBardGooner

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

As always Great work LFG :barscarf: :hail:
Ahhhh back when there was love between the Ewok and Dwarf races.... :D :wink:
:cry:

He started it, the fat little orange fucker :lol:

Where is he btw :rubchin:

User avatar
mcdowell42
Posts: 12738
Joined: Tue Nov 04, 2008 6:19 pm
Location: ireland

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby mcdowell42 » Wed Oct 31, 2018 7:05 pm

I walked in the bedroom to find my wife dead in the bed the other day.

Looking at her lifeless there, I decided to have one last go. Right in the middle she opened her eyes and shouted BOO! Honestly, some people are fucking sick in the head.

User avatar
mcdowell42
Posts: 12738
Joined: Tue Nov 04, 2008 6:19 pm
Location: ireland

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby mcdowell42 » Wed Oct 31, 2018 7:11 pm

A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Little Larry says: "I wanna start out as a Fighter Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest whore, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while banging her like a loose screen door in a hurricane."
The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Larry, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson
"And how about you, Sarah?"
"I wanna be Larry's whore"

User avatar
augie
Posts: 24977
Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2007 3:03 pm
Location: Ireland

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby augie » Mon Nov 05, 2018 8:40 am

:coffeespit: :coffeespit: :coffeespit:

User avatar
DB10GOONER
Posts: 46498
Joined: Tue Jan 16, 2007 2:06 pm
Location: Dublin, Ireland.
Contact:

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Wed Nov 07, 2018 7:07 am

I walked in the bedroom to find my wife dead in the bed the other day.

Looking at her lifeless there, I decided to have one last go. Right in the middle she opened her eyes and shouted BOO! Honestly, some people are fucking sick in the head.
:lol: :lol: :lol:

User avatar
mcdowell42
Posts: 12738
Joined: Tue Nov 04, 2008 6:19 pm
Location: ireland

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby mcdowell42 » Wed Nov 07, 2018 10:28 pm

Son: Why is my sister called Teresa?
Dad: Coz your mum loves Easter - it's an anagram
Son: Thanks dad
Dad: No problem Alan

User avatar
mcdowell42
Posts: 12738
Joined: Tue Nov 04, 2008 6:19 pm
Location: ireland

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby mcdowell42 » Wed Nov 07, 2018 10:30 pm

I'm having regular sex with a blind woman.

The sex is great but it isn't easy getting her husband’s voice right.

User avatar
mcdowell42
Posts: 12738
Joined: Tue Nov 04, 2008 6:19 pm
Location: ireland

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby mcdowell42 » Wed Nov 07, 2018 10:34 pm

Just had a good night out down the pub so I jumped in a taxi and said "take me to where I can get my cock sucked for a tenner mate"

Bit gutted when he took me to our house

User avatar
DB10GOONER
Posts: 46498
Joined: Tue Jan 16, 2007 2:06 pm
Location: Dublin, Ireland.
Contact:

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby DB10GOONER » Thu Nov 08, 2018 6:47 am

Just had a good night out down the pub so I jumped in a taxi and said "take me to where I can get my cock sucked for a tenner mate"

Bit gutted when he took me to our house
:lol:

Well at least now you know how it feels to be Spuddy. :shock:

:wink:

User avatar
Postman
Posts: 309
Joined: Tue Sep 02, 2008 9:21 am
Location: N5

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby Postman » Wed Nov 14, 2018 9:43 am

Saw 2 blind men fighting yesterday,
Didn't know how to stop them fighting,
So I shouted "I'm supporting the one with the knife"
They both stopped & ran away.

LeftfootlegendGooner
Posts: 7995
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Wed Nov 14, 2018 4:02 pm

Mc42 you been looking through the earlier jokes on this thread haven't you, you naughty little minx :lol:

User avatar
mcdowell42
Posts: 12738
Joined: Tue Nov 04, 2008 6:19 pm
Location: ireland

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby mcdowell42 » Wed Nov 14, 2018 7:38 pm

Sickipedia

LeftfootlegendGooner
Posts: 7995
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 1:07 pm

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Postby LeftfootlegendGooner » Wed Nov 14, 2018 8:38 pm

Sickipedia
And all on here already :wink:


Return to “The Cannonballs”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 12 guests