LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

[DB10GOONER]

Quote OneBardGooner



As always Great work LFG

Ahhhh back when there was love between the Ewok and Dwarf races....

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

My wife said to me that holiday sex is definitely the best.

That's the worst postcard I've ever had tbf.

Poor old Finsbury Park Gooner.....

I think that joke was made for him

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

Quote OneBardGooner



As always Great work LFG

Ahhhh back when there was love between the Ewok and Dwarf races....

He started it, the fat little orange fucker

Where is he btw

[mcdowell42]

I walked in the bedroom to find my wife dead in the bed the other day.

Looking at her lifeless there, I decided to have one last go. Right in the middle she opened her eyes and shouted BOO! Honestly, some people are fucking sick in the head.

[mcdowell42]

A teacher asks the kids in her 3rd grade class: "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Little Larry says: "I wanna start out as a Fighter Pilot, then be a billionaire, go to the most expensive clubs, find me the finest whore, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel throughout Europe, an Infinite Visa Card, and all the while banging her like a loose screen door in a hurricane."
The teacher, shocked and not knowing what to do with this horrible response from little Larry, decides not to acknowledge what he said and simply tries to continue with the lesson
"And how about you, Sarah?"
"I wanna be Larry's whore"

[augie]

[DB10GOONER]

I walked in the bedroom to find my wife dead in the bed the other day.

Looking at her lifeless there, I decided to have one last go. Right in the middle she opened her eyes and shouted BOO! Honestly, some people are fucking sick in the head.

[mcdowell42]

Son: Why is my sister called Teresa?
Dad: Coz your mum loves Easter - it's an anagram
Son: Thanks dad
Dad: No problem Alan

[mcdowell42]

I'm having regular sex with a blind woman.

The sex is great but it isn't easy getting her husband’s voice right.

[mcdowell42]

Just had a good night out down the pub so I jumped in a taxi and said "take me to where I can get my cock sucked for a tenner mate"

Bit gutted when he took me to our house

[DB10GOONER]

Just had a good night out down the pub so I jumped in a taxi and said "take me to where I can get my cock sucked for a tenner mate"

Bit gutted when he took me to our house

Well at least now you know how it feels to be Spuddy.

[Postman]

Saw 2 blind men fighting yesterday,
Didn't know how to stop them fighting,
So I shouted "I'm supporting the one with the knife"
They both stopped & ran away.

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

Mc42 you been looking through the earlier jokes on this thread haven't you, you naughty little minx

[mcdowell42]

Sickipedia

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

Sickipedia

And all on here already