SteveO, my name is rodders and I’m an addict. Welcome to the group. Arsenal are my fix, plain and simple. On reflection it’s probably better that it’s that than something more destructive (is there even something more fucking destructive
) regardless of the mental and physical toll it’s taken on me down through the years!
Maybe I’ve an addictive personality, I probably do, but it’s always been this way, for as long as I can remember. To nick a quote from the great Chuck Dickens - they were the best of times, they were the worst of times, and that’s what they were and that’s what they continue to be to this day and as long as I’m breathing in and out it will forever be this way.
Arsenal have been responsible for the highest highs in my life but on the flip side they’ve also inflicted the lowest lows. From tears of joy to tears of anguish I’m forever chasing the buzz. The 3 points, the last minute winner, the thrill of the goal, the adrenaline, the buzz, the ups, the downs, the rollercoaster ride of the season I I just fucking can’t get enough of it.
I think I was maybe 14/15 when Fever Pitch came out and I vividly remember reading it and thinking that for the first time in my life everything finally made sense. The words I was reading off those pages could have been written by me, time didn’t pass by in years it passed by in seasons. My whole week’s mood could be determined by the result of a Saturday 3pm kick off (remember those?). My entire life revolved around the fate of a football club from north London and that proved to be equal part exciting and equal part terrifying.
I have a million stories I could tell you about my life as a fan but one that comes to mind right now is form the double winning season in ‘98. We were away to Bolton after Christmas with the title race hotting up but went there with a very depleted side and our backs up against the wall. I remember listening to the game on 5 Live in my bedroom and the pressure and tension was just incredible. When you listen to a game on the radio every time the opposition cross the half way line it’s a doomsday scenario in your head. Not being able to see what’s going on makes you fear the absolute worst right throughout the 90 minutes, it’s incredibly stressful.
Anyway Christopher Wreh put us one up and we had to fucking dig in and defend for our lives. I remember my heart was absolutely pounding our through my chest and the tension and pressure I was feeling was incredible. It got to such a level that I could no longer bare to be in the same room as the radio so I left and paced up and down the landing listening to the commentary from there.
For the final 10 minutes I couldn’t even bare that so I went down stairs and sat on the bottom stair with my head in my hands straining to hear the commentary from my room. It was like a coping mechanism for my body to get as far away as possible from the source of my anguish.
When the full time whistle went the feeling of absolute euphoria I felt was incredible and chasing those kind of highs is what keeps me coming back for more.
If we were 13th on the last day of the season and we needed to win by 2 clear goals to finish 12 I would get a buzz out of it if that’s what happened. I’ll take it where I can get it no matter the significance of the game.
I know me and you took the major piss out of the glorious 4th place finishes at St. James’s and the hawthorns but I also got a pretty decent high from those days.
Tomorrow against Burnley I will get a buzz if we score, I’ll get a bigger one if we win and if the chavs beat the scum I’ll chalk it down as pretty decent Sunday all things considered. If things don’t go our way I’ll be down in the dumps so once more everything hangs in the balance.
I’m always chasing the next hit and whilst it would be great if it was coming from winning leagues or champions leagues if it comes from a 1 nil win from an OG in a nothing game do ya know what? I’ll fucking take it and once the euphoria fades I’ll have a look to see where the next hit is coming from because like a proper addict I’m always chasing the next one.
Disclaimer…I’ve had lots of wine tonight but tomorrow 2pm is my drug of choice.
My name is rodders and I’m an addict.
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Post Of The Year Rodders me ole mucker... and Fellow Addict... I too have had times so alike to what you have described (listening to a game on the radio whilst placing myself in another room - even in the garden once - with the commentary just - Just barely within hearing distance through the window whilst I pretended to do the garden - so that if either side scored I would hear the Roar!)..
My name is OBG and I too am an Addict - But proud to be so in such illustrious company - Arsenal FC is a life life Love Affair, Marriage and Addiction... Sometimes it takes me to blissful happiness and Heaven sometimes it utterly destroys me and makes me one miserable, inconsolable, cranky fucker...
Such is Life as a Gooner.
Ooh! To Ohh! To Be!