Bradywasking wrote: ↑Fri Jul 04, 2025 7:34 amWhile I understand the shock of tragedies like this I cannot understand to need to " own" the tragedy. The individual tributes on Social Media are more about the poster than the unfortunate victim of the tragedy. The reality about footballers is that we don't know them , we know them on the pitch and in the media or through their own Social Media posts. While Liverpool fans have lost a hero I can't understand the belief that they have lost a friend.
I'm not trying to be cruel but the need from this generation to own these tragedies, to be seen to be more publicly profound than the previous Social Media post, to use words and images to make it your grief and make it as important as the genuine grief of the family of the victim is again more about the poster than the victim.
The death of two brothers in a car accident is devastating for their family and friends, it is upsetting for the rest of the world, it is upsetting for the supporters of the teams they played for, and in time the respective clubs will mark the tragedy in a (hopefully) dignified manner. People who were not born when a legendary manager of the club was managing or even alive posting AI images of said manager welcoming the young footballer who died into heaven is in my humble opinion crass. Thoughts and Prayers is a cliche , let me be seen to grieve the loudest, but only in public is what it means.
I totally agree BWK. It's not a matter of being heartless, or cruel, but I think there's quite a few of us on here from a similar vintage and we have seen how the reaction to these tragedies has changed over the years. My daughters (both mid 20s) don't agree with me when I express opinions like yours and I think they do find it rather hard hearted, but they've grown up in a world of this heart on the sleeve, confected grief.
I watched the news last night and there were grown men crying outside Anfield. As you say, as tragic and sad as this case is, they aren't loved ones and didn't know Jota beyond watching him play football. You're right about people making it about themselves and that's why I actually find the over reactions fake and therefore disrespectful. Your term "owning it" is spot on. I can't help wondering, maybe too uncharitably, how many people want to be able to say "I was there". If you want to go to the ground and look at the tributes, then do so quietly and solemnly. That said, I think some people kind of get swept up in the hysteria rather than consciously making it about themselves.
There's a lot to be said about the "stiff upper lip" approach of old and keeping a grip on public displays of emotions. Sure, it probably sometimes went too far and forced people to repress feelings, but we've gone way too far in the opposite direction. As DB says, its symptomatic of the social media, celebrity driven society we have, where every wannabe celeb is looking for their 15 minutes of fame.
I also agree with your "thoughts and prayers" comment. The other one I can't stand, which is trotted out all the time is "sorry for your loss". It's horribly trite and sounds unthinking and therefore insincere. Maybe I over analyse this stuff (Me? Surely not), but we can't help what we notice.
