An open letter to all Man Utd “fansâ€

[Eboue Can't Defend]

Fuck it!! That's twice I have written a comprehensive response to both the original article and all the stuff written on here since. Both times I lost the item during the submitting process and I haven't got the will to write it all again (trust me, they were both long and very serious!!!).

Suffice to say that both Manchester United and Arsenal are great football clubs with long and success-filled histories. Both clubs have a world-wide fan base (which shouldn't be knocked by the way), and a list of achievements to be proud of. Why are we having a 'whose got the biggest willy' competition for?

As long as we both have a 'massive schlonger' and get our metaphorical leg-over regularly what does it matter if United have won more trophies or that Arsenal were the first of the so-called 'big clubs' to have an era (the 30's) full of dominence and sustained success? Or even who the better manager is out of Ferguson and Wenger? (I'm sure we're both very happy with who we have got in charge of our clubs).

Instead, let's take the piss out the boy with the penis envy - Chelsea, not Mourinho - and rejoice in the fact that we haven't needed advanced cosmetic surgery (thanks to rich Uncle Roman) to help enhance the size of our schlonger and make ourselves more attractive!! Anyway, we all know it will sag eventually - it's just a matter of time.

And to think I've missed the South American football on Sky because of reading all the posts on here and my thus-far unsuccessful attempts to respond to them. Shall not be doing that again in a hurry - at least until tomorrow.

Anyway, I'm going back to smoking my big fat blunt and if you lot had any sense, you would do the same (or whatever vice it is that floats your boat!!) Chill out everyone. God is a Gooner!!

[daz10_uk]

Thats pulled them (the secret ManUre fans who read this forum) out of the woodwork hasnt it gooner ed. well done

[Galasso]

You really are a dopey t##t arent you. (were not allowed to swear on here are we) poncy mard-arses.




The season you call "unbeaten is not true". The actual fact is yes you went unbeaten in the league - not the season. In fact Arsenal actually lost more games in their "unbeaten" season than United did in all competitions when we won our "flukey" treble.

As for most goals and all this shit - We have won more titles, hence more wins so we must of scored the most goals. 100 + in 2001 if I remember correctly.
Yes we may have never won the league at Highbury but we have never been hammered 6-2 at home by you or 6-1 by you...EVER!!!!

You goes on about never being relegated - Not true at all. You got relegated at the expense of Spurs as they had more money - hence the bitter rivalry with Tottenham. You should never fucking be in North London. You are actually from Greenwich

You're so proud you've never been relegated. So why the fuck have you not won more league titles for fuck sake...Middle of the road mediocrity...THATS FUCKING WHY!!

Fergie inherited the Beckhams, Giggs, Scholes' - so why the fuck doesnt Wenger inherit a golden generation?? Fergie clearly nurtured the yougsters and gave them all their opportunities. You then say we were the only teams with cash when we were dominating...Did you not spend £7m on Bergkamp and £5m on David Platt in 1996 respectably??
Wenger signed Wiltord for £13m he scored a massive 49 goals in 5 seasons...Yes he has made some great signings but so has Fergie. Irwin, Schmeical, Ole, Johnsen being only a few.



94 team that played Arsenal

Schmeichel - Brondby
Parker - QPR
Irwin - Oldham
Bruce - Norwich
Sharpe - Torquay
Pallister - Middlesbrough
Cantona - Leeds
Ince - West Ham
Keane - Forest
Hughes - Barcelona
Giggs

Yes Sir Alex Ferguson inherited that lot.

Sir, I shall ask the housekeeper of this forum to give you the beating of your life. Damned peasants....

Why do you want to have this pissing contest when your fans continually say that we are not on your radar and have to shove it down our throats that you are a bigger club (although a bigger club would be handy right now!)

As has been mentioned, the post was a lighthearted dig at an opponent. Wasn't entirely correct but it's just a fanzine!

Arsenal has a great history, as do Man Utd - which no fan who knows there stuff would argue with.

And you can *word censored*, bollocks and fuck all you like, it just the abusive nature of these posts. We are gentle souls.

I'm 93 you know......where am I??

[Cus Geezer]

"Stevenage, Croydon, Welwyn Garden City?" One of your moronic post-96ers asks. Well, if anyone would know, it would be you Nick Hornby's. A more middle-class, home counties-esque support you would be hard pushed to find.

Yes but the Home Counties revolves around London you fuckwit, "home" counties, where London's commuters have their "home". The Home Counties is the LONDON DIASPORA (big word I know but look it up) And Islington is in London, look at a map.

How far away from the Home Counties is Manchester. The nearest most of your supporters get to Manchester is watching Coronation Street.

That is why I couldn't give a fuck for this willy waving contest that your fans like to revel in. I'm not supporting this club for the glory I have a connection with it, I live in the same City as my club. Where I can't get to Ashburton Grove I'm watching in the 12 Pins in Finsbury Park.

To most of your fans Manchester United is a CONSUMER decision, they are consumers and not supporters. Their link with the club is about as meaningful as that they have with the Big Mac they just quaffed while sitting in their armchairs watching Sky Sports.

And who ever said they were supporting Liverpool in the 80s is well off the mark. It was more like Miami Dolphins or Chicago Bears, when that Home Counties trend was in full swing.

[Cus Geezer]

it would be you Nick Hornby's

Nick Hornby's what?

Or is that just poor grammar?

[krom85]

Ok so I've read through the majority of the posts since I logged off yesterday and there were some decent replies amongst the utter dirge too.

Tony at no point did I ever attack the 14 year old, I didn't even respond to his posts. My points were mostly well addressed by Gooner.Ed so fair play to him. I still think it's a bit "clutching at straws" with some of the records and achievements he claims! It's very "Cityesque"!

My final point was why, if as UFG states you lament your own tarquins and post Eruo '96ers, do you persist on coming to OT each season and singing "60,000 muppets", as if your support contained none? Is this not a case of irony on your part?

[Galasso]

Ok so I've read through the majority of the posts since I logged off yesterday and there were some decent replies amongst the utter dirge too.

Tony at no point did I ever attack the 14 year old, I didn't even respond to his posts. My points were mostly well addressed by Gooner.Ed so fair play to him. I still think it's a bit "clutching at straws" with some of the records and achievements he claims! It's very "Cityesque"!

My final point was why, if as UFG states you lament your own tarquins and post Eruo '96ers, do you persist on coming to OT each season and singing "60,000 muppets", as if your support contained none? Is this not a case of irony on your part?

Krom85

You're right - we should really update that song to reflect the increased size of your stadium!

I think the 60,000 muppets is much do with the eerie silences that descend upon Old Trafford. Although I stand to be corrected - I'm getting on a bit...much debate goes on here about our support.

I think a better example of our irony was when we started singing "We're by far the greatest team, the world has ever seen" when we were 6-1 down in 2001 with a defence containing Igors Stepanovs.

Now that's irony my friend.

[gooner.ed]

Fuck it!! That's twice I have written a comprehensive response to both the original article and all the stuff written on here since. Both times I lost the item during the submitting process and I haven't got the will to write it all again (trust me, they were both long and very serious!!!).

believe it or not the reason for the tech problems (and i also lost 30 mins worth of typing in response to a pm weds evening) is the sheer number of manure fans viewing the forum and this particular thread. my advice is to just copy all of your text before submitting it in case that happens. even a short posting is taking ages to post - hit the 'further discussion' at the top after waiting a minute and your post should be there - but some are being lost as the server cannot cope with the influx of manure fans.

still, maybe some of them are learnign something, and they are certainly keeping you regulars entertained

now to copy this (control plus a buttons, followed by control plus c buttons at the same time for the technophobes) as i don't want to type it again! (then hit contol plus v buttons if you do need to try again on a new reply)

[T.S]

Well it's all a bit more friendly here this morning, isn't it? Always good to see. Maybe we can actually get a bit of friendly banter going on without degenerating in to 5 year-olds. Still, I shan't hold my breath!

Also, Krom - as far as your point about "60,000" Muppets goes (may I point out that I still don't know what a Tarquin is), I do not lament our post Euro '96ers. If they're that young, then fair enough, but otherwise, I don't think anyone at The Gooner does stick up for them. Quite the opposite in fact. Believe me, it does seem that we should sing "20,000 Muppets" at most games (especially 10 minutes before the end) to our own prawn sandwich brigade, but alas, it doesn't happen.

But hey ho, that topic has been done to death, so I'll leave it there!

[Hagbard 23]

Yes indeed yesterdays little spat with the mancs was great stuff indeed! At one point my head actually started spinning trying to keep up with everyone quoting what everyone else had said. But reading through it again this morning, what they were basically saying was "we're a bigger club than you, we got more support than you, you're crap and were ace" . They were quite an illiterate bunch weren't they! However, highlight of the afternoon was the usually composed Tony S, getting obviously very hot under the collar. and calling them, at various points during the debate "all f***ing pathetic", "stupid w***ers who make me sick"and I think" f***ing imbeciles" was mentioned as well!! Great stuff lads, you all did us proud, especially young BenGooner, who did more than hold his own after a barrage of insults. You all did us proud. Three points to us I think!

[T.S]

Yeah, idiots who descend on OUR forum en masse and try to condescend a fourteen year-old who is clearly a lot smarter than them does get me a little hot under the collar (in the Roy Keane sense – not the Michael Jackson sense!). However, thanks to Ben’s maturity, it was a case of bullying gone wrong yesterday. Gutted.

I’m normally not one for the moral high-ground, but those Mancs needed to be knocked down a peg or two. Still, I can only imagine that they’ll be back at some stage to flap their gums in our general direction. So I shall look forward to that!

[Rafales]

Please Site Admin...close this Topic. Lets keep this Forum Clean as much as we can.

No one gains nothing from using filthy language and bad words.

This is not the best way to express your love for the club....(by using foul language) There are lot of other ways...

Please keep the debate as gentle as possible....

My request for Manu fans and Arsenal fans is please stop the growth of this Topic...

[Cus Geezer]

Can the Man Ure fans now piss off to another website, may I recommend www.onetouchfootball.com. These brain donors should feel at home there.

I know that the title of that article inadvertently invites them on here but I didn't sign up to this forum to talk to the idiots of the global village, which is what Man Ure's Home Counites fan base is in essence.

[Eboue Can't Defend]

now to copy this (control plus a buttons, followed by control plus c buttons at the same time for the technophobes) as i don't want to type it again! (then hit contol plus v buttons if you do need to try again on a new reply)

gooner.ed, What the fudge ???????????

Bruv, appreciate the advice but couldn't make head or tale of it!! I know you normally press control C to copy and control V to paste. However, don't know what the control A is all about .

Anyway, sometimes you get so into what you are trying to write, that you don't think about copying and saving the item midway through the process. Then, when you go to actually submit your post - it just disappears (I suppose we could call it the Thierry Henry affect )

So, gooner.ed, what are the chances of getting a faster server (Sampras, Roddick or even that Croatian fellow who really has got speed ) to ensure that the wider world is no longer ocassionally deprived of my all encompassing wisdom, due to technical errors?

P.S. Talking about technical points: Isn't Ben Gooner 14 too young to be holding his own??

[Galasso]

So, gooner.ed, what are the chances of getting a faster server (Sampras, Roddick or even that Croatian fellow who really has got speed )

May I suggest rather than a faster server, a more feminine server. Such as Ana Ivanovic. She's ace, and I am sure she would love the job. She would be a match for anything on this website, even if it breaks down