Boll*cks Commentary sayings

Rowly · Post by **Rowly** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 8:34 am

Classic Clive Tyldesley quotes:

'He went through a non-existant gap.'

'Anelka was travelling so fast that he couldn't keep his own feet'

'He's showed him the left leg, then the right. Where's the ball, the defender asks? It's up his sleeve.'

'One or two of their players aren't getting any younger'

'Heâ€™s not George Best, but then again, no-one is'

'He is the man who has been brought on to replace Pavel Nedved. The irreplaceable Pavel Nedved.'

'If they come back it's a night we'll remember for a long time. But that's a capital if.'

tomkingsbury · Post by **tomkingsbury** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 8:35 am

Of course, everything that ever comes out of Mark Lawrenceson's trap is pure bollocks.

Most definately - the guy is a wanker - does he think he's some kind of stand up comedian

Also, fucking ahte david pleat too, not only does that kiddy fiddling twat talk utter garbarge, but he always deliberately mispronounces foreign players' names i.e. Terry 'H'enry
Fucking cockhound, why doesnt he piss of back to kerb crawling

Rilo II · Post by **Rilo II** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 8:53 am

Ah you've reminded me of a great one by David Pleat. It was during one of Barca's champions league matches (I think against Chelsea), Etoo had a decent chance but hit the post, and Pleat came out with

"That's a miss by his standards"

Surely it's a miss by anyones standards, seeing as how it missed

exiled in notts · Post by **exiled in notts** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 9:25 am

tomkingsbury wrote:
Of course, everything that ever comes out of Mark Lawrenceson's trap is pure bollocks.
Most definately - the guy is a wanker - does he think he's some kind of stand up comedian

Also, fucking ahte david pleat too, not only does that kiddy fiddling twat talk utter garbarge, but he always deliberately mispronounces foreign players' names i.e. Terry 'H'enry
Fucking cockhound, why doesnt he piss of back to kerb crawling

Spot on. Lawrenson's like a cross between the pub bore and a third rate Jimmy Tarbuck droning on for the entire game. Tarby's third rate to start with, so what does that make Lawrenson?

Pleat's just an embarrassment. The only possible excuse for the mangled garbage he spews must be early onset dementia. It's like having Nana Moon off Eastenders as a co-commentator.

U.F.G Anfield '89 · Post by **U.F.G Anfield '89** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 2:24 pm

Spot on. Lawrenson's like a cross between the pub bore and a third rate Jimmy Tarbuck droning on for the entire game. Tarby's third rate to start with, so what does that make Lawrenson?

5th rate

Only One Tony Adams · Post by **Only One Tony Adams** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 2:28 pm

daz10_uk wrote:
gus ceasar is a legend wrote:Anyhow 50 minutes later no doubt the game was forgotten as Pleat got noshed off by a 10 quid scouse brass outside Stanley Park!

Oh that's made my day ...............double funny

.

Magic Hat · Post by **Magic Hat** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 5:58 pm

If I remember right, the Fink Tank showed that a team is weakest when they have conceded rather then when they score. Most of what commentators say is biased garbage, I just learn to ignore it

corkbarry · Post by **corkbarry** » Fri Aug 17, 2007 6:15 pm

Remember that twit that said :its up for grabs now:

OH OH he was right