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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Wed Oct 23, 2019 7:54 pm
by LeftfootlegendGooner
Not sure if it's worth posting jokes when only 2 people see them, as much as I like you two people lol.

I will let this thread slip into obscurity, very much like Arsene.

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Wed Oct 23, 2019 9:12 pm
by corkbarry
LeftfootlegendGooner wrote:
Wed Oct 23, 2019 7:54 pm
Not sure if it's worth posting jokes when only 2 people see them, as much as I like you two people lol.

I will let this thread slip into obscurity, very much like Arsene.
I'm sure Wenger and Emery find them amusing which makes at least 3 of us.

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 5:52 am
by DB10GOONER
LeftfootlegendGooner wrote:
Wed Oct 23, 2019 7:54 pm
Not sure if it's worth posting jokes when only 2 people see them, as much as I like you two people lol.

I will let this thread slip into obscurity, very much like Arsene.
Only 2 might comment but I'd say a lot of people do read them mate. Personally I hope you keep up the good work as there are some days your jokes literally prevent me killing a train load of my fellow commuters! 8)

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:10 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
DB10GOONER wrote:
Thu Oct 24, 2019 5:52 am
LeftfootlegendGooner wrote:
Wed Oct 23, 2019 7:54 pm
Not sure if it's worth posting jokes when only 2 people see them, as much as I like you two people lol.

I will let this thread slip into obscurity, very much like Arsene.
Only 2 might comment but I'd say a lot of people do read them mate. Personally I hope you keep up the good work as there are some days your jokes literally prevent me killing a train load of my fellow commuters! 8)
:lol: :lol:

You have my sympathy friend, I only get on a train once in a blue moon and indeed wish I'd gone armed :lol:

I will endeavour to bring crap jokes and the very odd funny one to you commute :barscarf: :lol:

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:26 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
Spain completed 850 passes in their game the other night .

The only way england could equal that is if we put Harry kane on mastermind .

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:27 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
What's the Difference between Red & Green?

Fuck all apparently if you’re on a bike.

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:29 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
One for your train journey DB.

The guy sat next to me on the train pulled out a photo of his wife and said, “She’s beautiful, isn’t she?”

I said, “If you think she’s beautiful, you should see my girlfriend mate.” He said, “Why? Is she a stunner?” I said, “No, she’s an optician.”

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:32 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
I can't see why  female linesman and referees could  be any worse than the idiots we have now.

I mean, if there is something women are good at, it is pointing out mistakes made by men.

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:33 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
Dear TAG heuer

I’m pretty sure that if I end up 500 meters under water, I won’t need a fuckin’ watch anymore.

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:39 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
I was staying in a hotel  last night.   I phoned down to reception. “Hi, this is room 26 Can I have a wake up call , please?”

She said “Yes, You’re in your mid 30s, Single , live with your mother and  have achieved nothing in life !"

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:51 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
A bloke walks into a pet shop and places a bomb on the counter and says ” you’ve got one minute to get out”, a tortoise in the back shouts ” you bastard!”

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:53 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
Feeling down in the dumps overweight, unfit, thinking you're getting old, got aches and pains, stiff back?

Well just park in a disabled bay at Tesco and everyone will be sure to tell you there's fuck all wrong with you .

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:54 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
My dad said you should always be up front with everyone .

Great bloke shit goalkeeper! .

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:55 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
Endless love ....

Stevie wonder and ray charles playing tennis

Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

Posted: Thu Oct 24, 2019 7:56 am
by LeftfootlegendGooner
A woman has sued a hospital, stating that after a recent operation, her husband had lost interest in sex.

The surgeon replied "all we did was restore his eyesight"