The Gooner Forum

LeftfootlegendGooner wrote: ↑

Fri Aug 26, 2022 9:14 am

In medieval times, people used to attach a lamp to a horse when riding at night.

This is the earliest known form of saddle light navigation.

Very Goooood!

Do you think if someone3 told that joke often enough their voice might get a little ho(a)rse?

OneBardGooner wrote: ↑

Fri Aug 26, 2022 12:23 pm

LeftfootlegendGooner wrote: ↑

Fri Aug 26, 2022 9:14 am

In medieval times, people used to attach a lamp to a horse when riding at night.

This is the earliest known form of saddle light navigation.

Very Goooood!

Do you think if someone3 told that joke often enough their voice might get a little ho(a)rse?

Maybe

ROOM WANTED: Need to find a room for blond Ukrainian stunner immediately.

Due to wife unexpectedly returning home.

My energy supplier proudly boasts that they use 100% renewables. They sent my renewal quote.

Can anybody tell me what day it was, when wind doubled in price?.

It must be an extremely worrying time for anybody who has dumped a body in a reservoir....

The last time I went to Blackpool I went on a donkey. It took me 3 days to get there

Did you know Yoda had a last name?

Layheehoo.

I got knocked over by a cyclist today. It was my own fault though,

I was walking on the pavement.

James Caan was in my two favourite movies; The Godfather and Honeymoon in Vegas with Sarah Jessica Parker.

One, a film where a man wakes up in bed and sees a horse's head lying next to him, and the other a mafia drama.

My wife really knows how to show me a good time.

She often points at people and says, "Look, they're having a good time."

As we were undressing in the hotel room the prostitute said; 'Just so you know, I don't do anal. Not for extra money, not for anything.'

I replied, 'You're the worst rent boy I've ever hired.'

Hickory dickory dock!
My wife avoids my cock!
She's losing her hair
And having an affair
So I had to slap Chris Rock!

I phoned my vet to have my cat put down and he said I need to make 9 appointments.

Say it ain't so DB

A dwarf was drinking in a bar, when a sexy blonde walked up to him and said ?I?ve always wanted to have sex with a little person.? The dwarf replied ?I?m sorry, but I?ve had women say that before, then I go home with them and the husband or boyfriend finds out and I get beaten up.? ?It?s ok,? said the woman, ?my husband is working away until next week.? So, against his better judgment he goes back with the woman. They start having amazing sex, when suddenly the front door opens. ?Shit, it?s my husband!? she said. ?Quick, hang out of the bedroom window and when he goes for a shower, you can climb in and get away!? So the dwarf climbs out of the window and hangs on the ledge by his fingertips. The husband comes in the bedroom, says ?It?s cold in here!? slams the window shut and the dwarf plummets to the ground. The woman is distraught and calls an ambulance. A couple of days later she goes to visit the dwarf in hospital. ?How are you?? she asked. ?Well, my fingers are broken, I?ve got two broken ankles, a dislocated hip and severe concussion, ?he said. ?Oh dear!? she said. ?Still, it could have been much worse.? ?Much worse?!? said the dwarf. ?How do you figure that out?? ?Well,? she said, ?you?re lucky that I live in a bungalow!?

Why is it spelled 'camouflage' and not