The Gooner Forum

Saw him last night on his tour, don't believe the reviews.

Paul Calf talking about his Dragon's Den idea to ween paedophiles off kids, 'start off with a hobbit, then a dwarf, Jeanette Krankie, then a Jockey, by then you're more or less normal again'. Classic!

He ends with some sort of musical number about tabloids stories about him being a *word censored* called 'Everyone's a bit of a *word censored* sometimes'.

Steve Coogan is brilliant. I've seen him live before, and yeah, Pauline Calf is a good one!
- still, he'll always be Alan Partridge, to me

g88ner wrote:Steve Coogan is brilliant. I've seen him live before, and yeah, Pauline Calf is a good one!
- still, he'll always be Alan Partridge, to me

On his Partridge set he does a chat with a husband and wife callled Jackie and Jacqui and says 'this'll be a bit confusing I'll just call you man and woman'. The woman tells him about the time when their house was burgled and her husband was tied up and raped by the burglers and Partridge retorts 'blimey, burgled, bound and buggered!'

He tells of the time he visited Bernard Matthews.

'Bernard asked 'are you a leg or a breast man', to which I replied 'are you talking about Turkeys or women' to which Bernard laughed. Bernard then explained 'once they get overweight, you hang them upside down and slit their throats' to which I replied 'are you talking about Turkeys or women'. Bernard then asked me to leave.