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Chickens.......HOW?
Posted: Tue Apr 20, 2010 5:44 pm
by mrgnu1958
How does a chicken squeeze an Egg out with the SHELL on?
Ive been thinking this all fecking afternoon.
I mean,when something comes outta my Arse,its SHELLESS!

Posted: Tue Apr 20, 2010 6:01 pm
by marcengels
Re: Chickens.......HOW?
Posted: Tue Apr 20, 2010 8:26 pm
by corkbarry
mrgnu1958 wrote:How does a chicken squeeze an Egg out with the SHELL on?
Ive been thinking this all fecking afternoon.
I mean,when something comes outta my Arse,its SHELLESS!

Imagine how you feel if it was going in instead of out

Posted: Tue Apr 20, 2010 8:49 pm
by MegaGooner
Posted: Tue Apr 20, 2010 9:07 pm
by mrgnu1958
Im ACTUALLY serious for a change.

Posted: Wed Apr 21, 2010 10:28 am
by marcengels
mrgnu1958 wrote:Im ACTUALLY serious for a change.

That's why this is a great thread.
I'm bumping this up.

Posted: Wed Apr 21, 2010 11:09 am
by REB
Posted: Wed Apr 21, 2010 11:22 pm
by safcftm
heres something i always wanted to know- i have my earphone things connected to me ipod. I get up to go to work and i carefully pick up said ipod and fold the wire up so i can get it in my pocket. It stays there. I don't touch it. Lunchtime comes and i go to walk to the shop. I carefully open my pocket and lift the said beast out
And the FUCKING WIRES ARE ALL FUCKING TANGLED
How in the fuck does the wire go in untangled, and come out tangled?
I am now convinced that I have angels in my pocket that tangle the wires just to amuse themselves whilst they are stuck there, it is the most logical explanation
Also, why are stairs called stairs when inside a house, and steps when outside? They are the same fucking thing
Oh, and the other day i had to drive a works van. It is one of those transits with no window in the back. I get in, and i adjust the headrest and then i look up and see... A FUCKING REAR VIEW MIRROR
Why the fuck would I want a rear view mirror when there is no fucking window to look out of at the back? Do i really need a view of the back of a van?
Posted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 5:48 am
by marcengels
safcftm wrote:heres something i always wanted to know- i have my earphone things connected to me ipod. I get up to go to work and i carefully pick up said ipod and fold the wire up so i can get it in my pocket. It stays there. I don't touch it. Lunchtime comes and i go to walk to the shop. I carefully open my pocket and lift the said beast out
And the FUCKING WIRES ARE ALL FUCKING TANGLED
How in the fuck does the wire go in untangled, and come out tangled?
I am now convinced that I have angels in my pocket that tangle the wires just to amuse themselves whilst they are stuck there, it is the most logical explanation
Also, why are stairs called stairs when inside a house, and steps when outside? They are the same fucking thing
Oh, and the other day i had to drive a works van. It is one of those transits with no window in the back. I get in, and i adjust the headrest and then i look up and see... A FUCKING REAR VIEW MIRROR
Why the fuck would I want a rear view mirror when there is no fucking window to look out of at the back? Do i really need a view of the back of a van?
Not quite to the standard of the ****

but good, good
Wires: It's in the action of you putting them in and taking them out of your pocket - and your big, fumbling, northern hands.
Stairs v Steps - I guess it something do with they actually being a structure in their own right, different from steps.
Rear-view mirror - Probably law that you have one. Then if someone attacks you, you've got a couple of extra seconds in which to panic.

Posted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 7:24 am
by franksav63
Posted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 3:36 pm
by SWLGooner
safcftm wrote:heres something i always wanted to know- i have my earphone things connected to me ipod. I get up to go to work and i carefully pick up said ipod and fold the wire up so i can get it in my pocket. It stays there. I don't touch it. Lunchtime comes and i go to walk to the shop. I carefully open my pocket and lift the said beast out
And the FUCKING WIRES ARE ALL FUCKING TANGLED
How in the fuck does the wire go in untangled, and come out tangled?
I am now convinced that I have angels in my pocket that tangle the wires just to amuse themselves whilst they are stuck there, it is the most logical explanation
Also, why are stairs called stairs when inside a house, and steps when outside? They are the same fucking thing
Oh, and the other day i had to drive a works van. It is one of those transits with no window in the back. I get in, and i adjust the headrest and then i look up and see... A FUCKING REAR VIEW MIRROR
Why the fuck would I want a rear view mirror when there is no fucking window to look out of at the back? Do i really need a view of the back of a van?
Hahaaaa...
i sense we have a defector.
Posted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 11:11 pm
by MegaGooner
Posted: Fri Apr 23, 2010 1:25 am
by hugh jardon
In Bangkok I saw a local lady project razor blades from her punani - how is this possible without causing massive internal injuries?
She was also able to shove a marker pen up there and write things on a poster such as "I LOVE HUGH JARDON" and even draw drawings.
How does one discover one has such a talent?
Posted: Fri Apr 23, 2010 1:32 am
by greatgooner
hugh jardon wrote:In Bangkok I saw a local lady project razor blades from her punani - how is this possible without causing massive internal injuries?
She was also able to shove a marker pen up there and write things on a poster such as "I LOVE HUGH JARDON" and even draw drawings.
How does one discover one has such a talent?
Have you never tried shoving a pencil up your Japs eye then?
Don't you realise that's were the term 'Lead in Your Pencil' comes from?
Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2010 5:17 pm
by OneBardGooner