The Gooner Forum

http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2011/ ... -providers

They're going to make us opt in if we want to see porn sites, bit of a disgrace like. There will be loads of people living with their parents and blokes whose internet is in the wifes name who will be worrying around now. Hopefully those who cant opt in wont find sites like this one blocked for "sexual content" just because of it having tit threads and such.

I'll be calling them to opt in like, can't wait for that conversation:
"Good morning, Sky broadband, Michelle speaking, how can I help you?"
"Awreet pet, here, gan and turn the porn on love"
"I'm sorry sir?"
"I'd like to opt in to the porn please, its just that I'm absolutely choking for a ***** so if you could do it straight away I'd appreciate it. I want to be able to access every porn site out there- I want straight porn, lesbian porn, watersports, femdom, group sex, voyeur movies, women getting fucked by a horse, men licking out their mates mother, men licking out their mothers mates, women smacking blokes in the balls, women shitting on glass tables, I want POV anal, cucumbers up the minge, birds who have just turned 18 rimming an 87 year old man- tell the government to fuck right off I want the whole fucking lot of it, bring it on yer bastards, the dirtier the fucking better!"
"Erm, okay sir, I have opted you in. Is there anything else I can help you with today?"
"Nope, I think that just about covers it pet, cheers"

But probably best in the basement.

I Hate Hleb wrote:

But probably best in the basement.

yes, probably for the best

That's fucking gutting

No worse than everytime I stay in a hotel for work me phoning reception and asking for the smut channels to be turned on or seeing them printed on my bill in the morning!

safcftm wrote:http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2011/ ... -providers

They're going to make us opt in if we want to see porn sites, bit of a disgrace like. There will be loads of people living with their parents and blokes whose internet is in the wifes name who will be worrying around now. Hopefully those who cant opt in wont find sites like this one blocked for "sexual content" just because of it having tit threads and such.

I'll be calling them to opt in like, can't wait for that conversation:
"Good morning, Sky broadband, Michelle speaking, how can I help you?"
"Awreet pet, here, gan and turn the porn on love"
"I'm sorry sir?"
"I'd like to opt in to the porn please, its just that I'm absolutely choking for a ***** so if you could do it straight away I'd appreciate it. I want to be able to access every porn site out there- I want straight porn, lesbian porn, watersports, femdom, group sex, voyeur movies, women getting fucked by a horse, men licking out their mates mother, men licking out their mothers mates, women smacking blokes in the balls, women shitting on glass tables, I want POV anal, cucumbers up the minge, birds who have just turned 18 rimming an 87 year old man- tell the government to fuck right off I want the whole fucking lot of it, bring it on yer bastards, the dirtier the fucking better!"
"Erm, okay sir, I have opted you in. Is there anything else I can help you with today?"
"Nope, I think that just about covers it pet, cheers"

You're not the bloke I was stood next to at the Nou Camp in March are you? He was complaining about being kept behind after the game as he was desperate to get back to some whore house because some bird was gonna let him piss all over her I nearly died laughing, he was getting proper irate lol

Good thing I'm not on Sky, Virgin, Talk Talk or BT though

safcftm wrote:http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2011/ ... -providers

They're going to make us opt in if we want to see porn sites, bit of a disgrace like. There will be loads of people living with their parents and blokes whose internet is in the wifes name who will be worrying around now. Hopefully those who cant opt in wont find sites like this one blocked for "sexual content" just because of it having tit threads and such.

I'll be calling them to opt in like, can't wait for that conversation:
"Good morning, Sky broadband, Michelle speaking, how can I help you?"
"Awreet pet, here, gan and turn the porn on love"
"I'm sorry sir?"
"I'd like to opt in to the porn please, its just that I'm absolutely choking for a ***** so if you could do it straight away I'd appreciate it. I want to be able to access every porn site out there- I want straight porn, lesbian porn, watersports, femdom, group sex, voyeur movies, women getting fucked by a horse, men licking out their mates mother, men licking out their mothers mates, women smacking blokes in the balls, women shitting on glass tables, I want POV anal, cucumbers up the minge, birds who have just turned 18 rimming an 87 year old man- tell the government to fuck right off I want the whole fucking lot of it, bring it on yer bastards, the dirtier the fucking better!"
"Erm, okay sir, I have opted you in. Is there anything else I can help you with today?"
"Nope, I think that just about covers it pet, cheers"

Dan_85 wrote:Good thing I'm not on Sky, Virgin, Talk Talk or BT though

Mate if you were on BT you wouldn't need the porn.

Joke for the regulars.

And the clique.

Number 5 wrote:

Dan_85 wrote:Good thing I'm not on Sky, Virgin, Talk Talk or BT though

Mate if you were on BT you wouldn't need the porn.

Joke for the regulars.

And the clique.

im ok over here the company im with upc wouldnt ban anything and even fought the goverment when they wanted to ban people for illegal downloads after the main internet provider eircom gave the government the ip address,s of people using pirate bay etc

Number 5 wrote:

Dan_85 wrote:Good thing I'm not on Sky, Virgin, Talk Talk or BT though

Mate if you were on BT you wouldn't need the porn.

Joke for the regulars.

And the clique.

What ever happened to BT, i use to like her comments on here, she hasn't eloped with ****, since he was booted off here -

come back BT, we all miss you

safcftm wrote: "Awreet pet, here, gan and turn the porn on love"

Fuking brilliant post safc