LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
A Scotsman and his wife walk past a swanky new restaurant in town and she says, "Wow! Smell that food, it smells delicious!"
Being a kindhearted Scot he thought, "What the hell... I'll treat her!"
So they walked past the restaurant again...
Being a kindhearted Scot he thought, "What the hell... I'll treat her!"
So they walked past the restaurant again...
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Took my trousers to the dry cleaners and said.."can you get another stain out of these like you did last week?"
He replied "Come again."
I said. "No, Red Wine this time."
He replied "Come again."
I said. "No, Red Wine this time."
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
My girlfriends been going down on me every day for the past month, I think I need a puncture repair kit
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
I've decided to identify as an American.
Well I'm going to give it a shot anyway
Well I'm going to give it a shot anyway
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
My gay mate is into extreme anal insertions but just broke up with his boyfriend.
I told him not to be sad, after all there's plenty of other fists in the sea.
I told him not to be sad, after all there's plenty of other fists in the sea.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
A girl in the US was shot in the head whilst playing hide and seek.
She clearly wasn't very good.
She clearly wasn't very good.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
In England, they will take a tree, cut it down, remove the branches and the bark until they are left with a cylinder. Next, they will take the cylinder of wood and turn it on a lathe and whittle away until they are left with a perfectly formed bat. The bat will be cured and treated to strengthen it and then, when it is finally ready, they will use it to knock a leather ball around a park.
In Scotland, they just throw the fucking tree.
In Scotland, they just throw the fucking tree.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
I met my new Spanish girlfriend at a local castanet club.
We just clicked.
We just clicked.
- OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
There's some crackers there Lefty.. Thank-You... I laughed with tears in my eyes....That'll teach me to read your posts while peeling onions! Boom! Boom!
Especially the Tribute to Diana one!
and
The Welsh magazines one!
That last one was Baaaaaa ad!
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
OneBardGooner wrote: ↑Fri May 12, 2023 1:29 pm
There's some crackers there Lefty.. Thank-You... I laughed with tears in my eyes....That'll teach me to read your posts while peeling onions! Boom! Boom!
Especially the Tribute to Diana one!
and
The Welsh magazines one!
That last one was Baaaaaa ad!
Cheers mate, I know that last one was so bad that I had to put it in
- OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Ohhh! Come on don't get all Sheepish on me!
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
LeftfootlegendGooner wrote: ↑Fri May 12, 2023 9:31 amTook my trousers to the dry cleaners and said.."can you get another stain out of these like you did last week?"
He replied "Come again."
I said. "No, Red Wine this time."
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
One for DB
What does the scrotum of a catholic priest look like?
Stupid question, even a child knows that.
What does the scrotum of a catholic priest look like?
Stupid question, even a child knows that.
- OneBardGooner
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
LeftfootlegendGooner wrote: ↑Fri May 12, 2023 7:45 pmOne for DB
What does the scrotum of a catholic priest look like?
Stupid question, even a child knows that.