LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
You'd never get planning permission to build a city on rock and roll.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Does anyone know how to fix a sat-nav?... ...Mine is broken, it keeps telling me Tottenham's in europe.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Just found out my uncle has left me a stately home in his will...I have no idea where Sod Hall is, I'm just off to Google it now!
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
I'm just on holiday and got my girlfriend to smuggle some coke up her arse through customs. I didn't realise I could've just bought another can in the departure lounge.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
After sex, there's nothing worse than finding a broken condom on your cock. Especially when you didn't start with one.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
What do a pulse and an orgasm have in common? I don't care if she has one.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
I had five hundred Kit Kats in my fridge and my mate had one in his. I pressured him into giving his to a homeless person. That's basically how celebrity charity appeals work.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Imagine The Titanic with a lisp.
It's unthinkable.
It's unthinkable.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Harvey Weinstein told me if i sucked his dick, i would become famous. ....said a bunch of famous women.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Accidently said hello to a feminist the other day. My trial starts on Monday.
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- Posts: 10498
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Scientists in China have successfully cloned two macaque monkeys.
It's quite impossible to tell them apart , said one of the monkeys
It's quite impossible to tell them apart , said one of the monkeys
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Told the girlfriend that Mum is deaf so speak loud and slow.
Told Mum that the girlfriend is retarded.
Told Mum that the girlfriend is retarded.
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
During my check-up I asked the Doctor, "Do you think I'll live a long and healthy life then?" He replied, "I doubt it somehow. Mercury is in Uranus right now." I said, "I don't go in for any of that astrology nonsense." He replied, "Neither do I. My thermometer just broke."
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Re: LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread
Last night a gunman burst into the Celebrity Big Brother house and killed everyone.
Victims are yet to be identified.
Victims are yet to be identified.