LeftfootlegendGooner's Friday joke thread

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

I come from a long line of Cocaine addicts.

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

I've written a book called 'My permanently exposed penis!”

It's out now

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

I knew I was going to fail my maths test when I entered the classroom, so I did a 360 and left.

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

People that practice for staring competitions need to take a good long look at themselves in the mirror.

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

'...Do you think it's fair that only one company is allowed to make the game Monopoly?'

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

I just heard a woodpecker call me a paranoid twat in morse code.

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

I think my local garage is ripping me off, does anyone else think £500 for a Tesla exhaust is a lot?

[DB10GOONER]

I wonder who'll die first, Anne or Camilla?

Either way it's a two horse race

[DB10GOONER]

I just heard a woodpecker call me a paranoid twat in morse code.

[OneBardGooner]

'I think my local garage is ripping me off, does anyone else think £500 for a Tesla exhaust is a lot?"



" I just heard a woodpecker call me a paranoid twat in morse code."




"I wonder who'll die first, Anne or Camilla?

Either way it's a two horse race"






Thanks Lefty, as ever bang on the money!

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

Cheers DB and Onebard, yes been playing cricket a lot, 6 games to go, win all six and we'll win the league, us and a Romsey team have won all our games.

They have an average of 23.4, ours is 23.22, maximum is 24 points per game.

They have the No1 bowler in the Hampshire county leagues.

Seems familiar to Arsenal against shitty

One of our best bowler's broke his thumb last night in a T20 game

We play them in two weeks time, should be good game.

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

Don't know how to post pics otherwise I would post league table

[OneBardGooner]

Cheers DB and Onebard, yes been playing cricket a lot, 6 games to go, win all six and we'll win the league, us and a Romsey team have won all our games.

They have an average of 23.4, ours is 23.22, maximum is 24 points per game.

They have the No1 bowler in the Hampshire county leagues.

Seems familiar to Arsenal against shitty

One of our best bowler's broke his thumb last night in a T20 game

We play them in two weeks time, should be good game.

For a moderate fee, DB and I can dispose of him for you... We've got the Transit fuelled and ready to go....A quick exit is cheaper, but if you want the c.unt tortured that adds 50% and if you want to watch then that'll also cost extra.

Just PM me in the next 3 days but you'll have to be quick as our services are much in demand.

Especially since the uhmm "Quartz Incident"

[LeftfootlegendGooner]

Cheers DB and Onebard, yes been playing cricket a lot, 6 games to go, win all six and we'll win the league, us and a Romsey team have won all our games.

They have an average of 23.4, ours is 23.22, maximum is 24 points per game.

They have the No1 bowler in the Hampshire county leagues.

Seems familiar to Arsenal against shitty

One of our best bowler's broke his thumb last night in a T20 game

We play them in two weeks time, should be good game.

For a moderate fee, DB and I can dispose of him for you... We've got the Transit fuelled and ready to go....A quick exit is cheaper, but if you want the c.unt tortured that adds 50% and if you want to watch then that'll also cost extra.

Just PM me in the next 3 days but you'll have to be quick as our services are much in demand.

Especially since the uhmm "Quartz Incident"

Thanks guys, do you accept bitcoin payment

[OneBardGooner]

Cheers DB and Onebard, yes been playing cricket a lot, 6 games to go, win all six and we'll win the league, us and a Romsey team have won all our games.

They have an average of 23.4, ours is 23.22, maximum is 24 points per game.

They have the No1 bowler in the Hampshire county leagues.

Seems familiar to Arsenal against shitty

One of our best bowler's broke his thumb last night in a T20 game

We play them in two weeks time, should be good game.

For a moderate fee, DB and I can dispose of him for you... We've got the Transit fuelled and ready to go....A quick exit is cheaper, but if you want the c.unt tortured that adds 50% and if you want to watch then that'll also cost extra.

Just PM me in the next 3 days but you'll have to be quick as our services are much in demand.

Especially since the uhmm "Quartz Incident"

Thanks guys, do you accept bitcoin payment

Absolutely.... But if the bottom falls out of the bitcoin market we send Spuddy around as a permanent guest