Chuck Norris Facts

Arsenal 1991 · Post by **Arsenal 1991** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 8:57 pm

Just to lighten the mood here are some Chuck Norris facts (hyper masculine actor from the 80s)

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

When Bruce Banner gets angry, he turns into the Hulk. When the Hulk gets angry, he turns into Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't push himself up, he pushes the earth down.

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.

Arsenal 1991 · Post by **Arsenal 1991** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 8:59 pm

Sorry basement it please.

Rugby Gooner · Post by **Rugby Gooner** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 8:59 pm

Chuck Norris walked into a bar,
The bar said ouch!

frankbutcher · Post by **frankbutcher** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 9:00 pm

Arsenal 1991 wrote:Sorry basement it please.

Arsenal 1991 · Post by **Arsenal 1991** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 9:05 pm

In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.

Arsenal 1991 · Post by **Arsenal 1991** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 9:05 pm

Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.

Arsenal 1991 · Post by **Arsenal 1991** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 9:05 pm

Rugby Gooner wrote:Chuck Norris walked into a bar,
The bar said ouch!

northbankbren · Post by **northbankbren** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 9:17 pm

Arsenal 1991 wrote:Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the fuck down.

Very good.

Post by **QuartzGooner** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 9:20 pm

Chuck Norris KO'd Roy Keane by looking at him.

Arsenal 1991 · Post by **Arsenal 1991** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 9:21 pm

A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and that you will be handicapped if you park there.

eliogooner · Post by **eliogooner** » Thu Mar 10, 2011 11:20 pm

Chuck Norris was born May 6,1945. The Nazis surrendered May 7, 1945.

northbankbren · Post by **northbankbren** » Fri Mar 11, 2011 9:10 am

marcengels · Post by **marcengels** » Fri Mar 11, 2011 9:20 am

This is what happens when you let a .com boy start a "humourous" thread...

Post by **flash gunner** » Fri Mar 11, 2011 9:21 am

marcengels wrote:This is what happens when you let a .com boy start a "humourous" thread...

Henry Norris 1913 · Post by **Henry Norris 1913** » Fri Mar 11, 2011 11:16 am

his brother henry has a footlong