Today feels like the beginning of the end.

[JMascis666]

Depends who's foot they used for the measurement really.

[mcdowell42]

In the long run the money has benefits but not without potential problems. one hand, it means that Arsenal’s debt will be wiped out with ease and the club will always have money to reinvest. On the other hand it will only attract more billionaires (some like Usmanov, others like Kroenke) who will want the whole pie to themselves. It’s not something restricted to Arsenal but considering that Arsenal are the richest club in England that haven’t been taken over AND are playing in the ‘richest league’ in the world, the financial numbers are the strategic equivalent of painting a bright bulls-eye on Arsenal’s heart.

In the long run the money has benefits but not without potential problems. one hand, it means that Arsenal’s debt will be wiped out with ease and the club will always have money to reinvest. On the other hand it will only attract more billionaires (some like Usmanov, others like Kroenke) who will want the whole pie to themselves. It’s not something restricted to Arsenal but considering that Arsenal are the richest club in England that haven’t been taken over AND are playing in the ‘richest league’ in the world, the financial numbers are the strategic equivalent of painting a bright bulls-eye on Arsenal’s heart.

Huh??????????

Wouldn't the easiest way to avoid being taken over by anyone be not to sell shares to anyone? As to Manchester United the fact is they successfully truned away one hostile takeover already by the Coolmore Mafia. So the idea that United is automatically more vulnerible to any takeover than we are is pure rubbish.

Any takeover hostile or otherwise succedding hinges entirely on whether ot not the shareholders are willing to sell to the takeover group. I mean I couild offer you a million pounds for your favorite record album, but if you don't want to sell it I can't buy it at any price can I ?

Same holds true here. The Board could instead take dividends anually which would represent terrific return on their investment , and since many made no actuial investm,ent themselves would in effect be free money for them, just less free money than some are looking to make this way. If Dan Fiszman or his family and Lady Bracewell-Smith made 30 million from dividends each say the next ten years how bad would that be for them or Arsenal? Especially if their real concern - or certainly Mr. Fiszman's is preventing certainly people from taking over?

If the concerns of these individuals were purely to nobly protect the Arsenal why look to sell out at all? Why not just take a reasonable dividend annually while remaining in control and in charge? They won't go poor or lose their homes or anything doing that will they? They are all multi-millionaires with or without what they make from Arsenal. So why sell for more when they could protect Arsenal for less and still make out quite well?

Sorry to confuse you there US i posted same thing twice but you know what i mean

[USMartin]

Usmanov’s faux pas (or that of his lawyers) has generated a lot of ill-will against him amongst Arsenal supporters and I doubt that he will be able to complete a hostile takeover, especially since the Arsenal board will be far more resilient to any takeover attempts as compared to the Manchester United board. The recent changes at Chelsea will also serve as a reminder for fans that rich owners do not always contribute to club harmony. The possibility that Wenger could be dismissed by the board is something the fans will not accept and as a result Arsenal’s chances of being taken over are quite low.

In that light then, the press release is a statement of intent for the current Arsenal board, their move to show the supporters that they are responsible for bringing good results (financially) to the club. But while this protects their current position it doesn’t do much for the future. Their next step should be a bold plan to secure more Arsenal shares under ‘friendly’ control – and if that means dealing with Kroenke, so be it. I’m sure that with the money being generated, the board can consider investing further into the club and offer to buy out Kroenke.

You can bet your house that Usmanov will do so, if he hasn’t already. Best for the board to move first and eliminate the possible threats to Arsenal instead of dealing with them later down the road.

Again Huh???????

Stan Kroenke by all accounts was the first businessman to attempt at take-over at Arsenal. In fact his take-over bid was why David Dein was dismissed from the Board.

And we already have rich owners at the club. Not billionaires but rich owners all the same. The fact that they want to sell to make themselves even richer is the sole reason there is any concern over who they kmight sell to and what the consequences of that might be.

The only question is whether their desire to sell at the highest possible profit trumped their consideration for the team they allow and enable the manager to put on the pitch.

[QuartzGooner]

@USMartin

I do not have to prove a thing.

I want to see three more good players signed, by Wenger.
I want to see a better organised defence, by Wenger.

But the board?

Seem ok to me, did a good job with the new stadium and training grounds.
The lack of atmosphere there is not down to the board, it is just the way football has gone with all-seater stadiums and more corporate fans.

If the board want to sell their shares, it is up to them, and they only get massive profit because there are people prepared to pay top dollar and top rouble for the shares.

[USMartin]

Sorry to confuse you there US i posted same thing twice but you know what i mean

No you didn't I fucked up and copied the same para tiwce

[USMartin]

In practical terms, the money will mean little in the short run. Arsene Wenger is not one to spend rashly, no matter what the amount of money available to him and he’s a creator, not a builder or a jigsaw puzzle artist. His vision for Arsenal is stubborn and it does not involve shelling out 25-30m for Samuel Eto’o, not when he sees Adebayor and Robin van Persie growing season upon season.

So why didn't he behave this way until right when we borrowed the extra 120 million to redeleop Highbury which increaed our debt by 50% meant we had to pay back an extra 120 million by 2010, and eliminated revenue which could have paid back our original loan until 2010? Coincidence?

[MutleyGooner]

The board would have made tonnes more cash through the redevelopment of Highbury had the US economy not gone tits up and caused a domino effect across the globe.

See it's not the boards fault at all, it's you planks................Again

[USMartin]

@USMartin

I do not have to prove a thing.

Sure you do. Why should I give you any more credibility for saying things you can't prove are in fact true especially when you refuse to prove them - which in fact sounds more like someone who cannot prove them and know it.

You want proof supporting my contentions - well I want proof supporting yours mate. I'll be glad to offer mine even by PM so long as you will offer yours. I don't think you will be willing to do that because frankly you have none other than your desire to believe and trust the Board without at best minimal exception.

I want to see three more good players signed, by Wenger.
I want to see a better organised defence, by Wenger.

But the board?

So you are saying that Arsene Wenger can spend whatever he wants on whoever he wants now?

Not three months ago you stated yet again that we just have to accept that spending won't increase - implying clearly that this was the case no matter the manager - until the debt was paid off. And clearly that would be apolicy set not by the manager but by the Arsenal Board.

So which is it then? Or is the fact that since 2006 we have made a net profit of 5 mlillion after at net spend of 5 million until 2005 a pure coincidence. Is the new wage structure created since 2006 a pure coincidence?

Seem ok to me, did a good job with the new stadium and training grounds.
The lack of atmosphere there is not down to the board, it is just the way football has gone with all-seater stadiums and more corporate fans.

Who's disucssing the lack of atmosphere?

If the board want to sell their shares, it is up to them, and they only get massive profit because there are people prepared to pay top dollar and top rouble for the shares.

That would be fine except there is the very genuine question of whether the lack of investment in the football team which has been behind the porifits in recent years wasn't calcualted delibertaely to attract such people.

Or again was that all coincidental?

[olgitgooner]

The board would have made tonnes more cash through the redevelopment of Highbury had the US economy not gone tits up and caused a domino effect across the globe.

See it's not the boards fault at all, it's you planks................Again

Good point.

Totally valid.

[mcdowell42]

mutley you have pm

[QuartzGooner]

@USMartin

The club has made a tidy profit on the Higbury Redevelopment.

[MutleyGooner]

Chapter I: Down the Rabbit-Hole
Alice was beginning to get very tired of sitting by her sister on
the bank, and of having nothing to do: once or twice she had
peeped into the book her sister was reading, but it had no
pictures or conversations in it, `and what is the use of a book,’
thought Alice `without pictures or conversation?’
So she was considering in her own mind (as well as she could,
for the hot day made her feel very sleepy and stupid), whether
the pleasure of making a daisy-chain would be worth the
trouble of getting up and picking the daisies, when suddenly a
White Rabbit with pink eyes ran close by her.
There was nothing so VERY remarkable in that; nor did Alice
think it so VERY much out of the way to hear the Rabbit say
to itself, `Oh dear! Oh dear! I shall be late!’ (when she thought
it over afterwards, it occurred to her that she ought to have
wondered at this, but at the time it all seemed quite natural);
but when the Rabbit actually TOOK A WATCH OUT OF ITS
WAISTCOAT- POCKET, and looked at it, and then hurried
on, Alice started to her feet, for it flashed across her mind that
she had never before seen a rabbit with either a waistcoat-pocket, or a watch to take out of it, and
burning with curiosity, she ran across the field after it, and fortunately was just in time to see it pop
down a large rabbit-hole under the hedge.
In another moment down went Alice after it, never once considering how in the world she was to get
out again.
The rabbit-hole went straight on like a tunnel for some way, and then dipped suddenly down, so
suddenly that Alice had not a moment to think about stopping herself before she found herself falling
down a very deep well.
Either the well was very deep, or she fell very slowly, for she had plenty of time as she went down to
look about her and to wonder what was going to happen next. First, she tried to look down and make
out what she was coming to, but it was too dark to see anything; then she looked at the sides of the
well, and noticed that they were filled with cupboards and book-shelves; here and there she saw maps
and pictures hung upon pegs. She took down a jar from one of the shelves as she passed; it was
labelled `ORANGE MARMALADE’, but to her great disappointment it was empty: she did not like to
drop the jar for fear of killing somebody, so managed to put it into one of the cupboards as she fell
past it.
`Well!’ thought Alice to herself, `after such a fall as this, I shall think nothing of tumbling down stairs!
How brave they’ll all think me at home! Why, I wouldn’t say anything about it, even if I fell off the top
of the house!’ (Which was very likely true.)
Down, down, down. Would the fall NEVER come to an end! `I wonder how many miles I’ve fallen by
this time?’ she said aloud. `I must be getting somewhere near the centre of the earth. Let me see: that
would be four thousand miles down, I think–’ (for, you see, Alice had learnt several things of this sort
in her lessons in the schoolroom, and though this was not a VERY good opportunity for showing off
her knowledge, as there was no one to listen to her, still it was good practice to say it over) `–yes,
that’s about the right distance–but then I wonder what Latitude or Longitude I’ve got to?’ (Alice had no
idea what Latitude was, or Longitude either, but thought they were nice grand words to say.)
Presently she began again. `I wonder if I shall fall right THROUGH the earth! How funny it’ll seem to

come out among the people that walk with their heads downward! The Antipathies, I think–’ (she was
rather glad there WAS no one listening, this time, as it didn’t sound at all the right word) `–but I shall
have to ask them what the name of the country is, you know. Please, Ma’am, is this New Zealand or
Australia?’ (and she tried to curtsey as she spoke–fancy CURTSEYING as you’re falling through the
air! Do you think you could manage it?) `And what an ignorant little girl she’ll think me for asking!
No, it’ll never do to ask: perhaps I shall see it written up somewhere.’
Down, down, down. There was nothing else to do, so Alice soon began talking again. `Dinah’ll miss
me very much to-night, I should think!’ (Dinah was the cat.) `I hope they’ll remember her saucer of
milk at tea-time. Dinah my dear! I wish you were down here with me! There are no mice in the air, I’m
afraid, but you might catch a bat, and that’s very like a mouse, you know. But do cats eat bats, I
wonder?’ And here Alice began to get rather sleepy, and went on saying to herself, in a dreamy sort of
way, `Do cats eat bats? Do cats eat bats?’ and sometimes, `Do bats eat cats?’ for, you see, as she
couldn’t answer either question, it didn’t much matter which way she put it. She felt that she was
dozing off, and had just begun to dream that she was walking hand in hand with Dinah, and saying to
her very earnestly, `Now, Dinah, tell me the truth: did you ever eat a bat?’ when suddenly, thump!
thump! down she came upon a heap of sticks and dry leaves, and the fall was over.
Alice was not a bit hurt, and she jumped up on to her feet in a moment: she looked up, but it was all
dark overhead; before her was another long passage, and the White Rabbit was still in sight, hurrying
down it. There was not a moment to be lost: away went Alice like the wind, and was just in time to
hear it say, as it turned a corner, `Oh my ears and whiskers, how late it’s getting!’ She was close behind
it when she turned the corner, but the Rabbit was no longer to be seen: she found herself in a long, low
hall, which was lit up by a row of lamps hanging from the roof.
There were doors all round the hall, but they were all locked; and when Alice had been all the way
down one side and up the other, trying every door, she walked sadly down the middle, wondering how
she was ever to get out again.
Suddenly she came upon a little three-legged
table, all made of solid glass; there was nothing
on it except a tiny golden key, and Alice’s first
thought was that it might belong to one of the
doors of the hall; but, alas! either the locks were
too large, or the key was too small, but at any
rate it would not open any of them. However, on
the second time round, she came upon a low
curtain she had not noticed before, and behind it
was a little door about fifteen inches high: she
tried the little golden key in the lock, and to her
great delight it fitted!
Alice opened the door and found that it led into a
small passage, not much larger than a rat-hole:
she knelt down and looked along the passage
into the loveliest garden you ever saw. How she
longed to get out of that dark hall, and wander
about among those beds of bright flowers and
those cool fountains, but she could not even get her head though the doorway; `and even if my head
would go through,’ thought poor Alice, `it would be of very little use without my shoulders. Oh, how I
wish I could shut up like a telescope! I think I could, if I only know how to begin.’ For, you see, so
many out-of-the-way things had happened lately, that Alice had begun to think that very few things
indeed were really impossible.

There seemed to be no use in waiting by the little door, so
she went back to the table, half hoping she might find
another key on it, or at any rate a book of rules for shutting
people up like telescopes: this time she found a little bottle
on it, (`which certainly was not here before,’ said Alice,)
and round the neck of the bottle was a paper label, with the
words `DRINK ME’ beautifully printed on it in large
letters.
It was all very well to say `Drink me,’ but the wise little
Alice was not going to do THAT in a hurry. `No, I’ll look
first,’ she said, `and see whether it’s marked “poisonâ€

[USMartin]

The board would have made tonnes more cash through the redevelopment of Highbury had the US economy not gone tits up and caused a domino effect across the globe.

See it's not the boards fault at all, it's you planks................Again

Really maybe we should have left you to deal with Hitler or Stalin after him on your own. Would you be happier speaking German or Russian?

Actually the problem is they forgot Arsenal was a football club and not just another company designed for maximizing share prices and profits at every opportunity. Arsenal isn't BP or Vodaphone or Barclays. Running a football club like those concerns was always going to benefit the shareholders and break the hearts of the supporters.

[mcdowell42]

Nina Bracewell-Smith last night hit out at her "appalling" treatment by Arsenal's directors after leaving the club's board ­following months of dispute over who controlled policy at the club.

Rumours abound that Lady Bracewell-Smith had discussed selling her shares to Alisher Usmanov, the Russian oligarch who owns 24.9% of Arsenal's shares, but sources say that is not what precipitated the schism culminating in her dismissal as a director on Wednesday night.

On the contrary, it is believed to have been Bracewell-Smith's dissatisfaction at a lack of influence within the club that led to her departure. "I'm in total shock and very upset about the appalling way I have been treated," she said. "The board have no manners whatsoever and my views were ignored on many occassions.



"I can't understand why I have been removed in such a ruthless fashion. I have had no proper explanation as to why they wanted me out so much. It is very difficult to accept especially after what my family has done for Arsenal for so many years."

The tensions had been reverberating for months around the club's board, which had put on an outward show of calm after the turbulent departure of David Dein in April 2007, but reached breaking point this week. Directors have followed the vision of Danny Fiszman, whose 24.11% stake made him the largest single ­shareholder in the club until Usmanov built a superior holding
It was Fiszman's decision to build the Emirates Stadium and to redevelop Highbury as a residential complex. But he now lives as a tax exile in Switzerland and his visits to the club are increasingly infrequent. That stoked frustration in Bracewell-Smith, who controls 15.9% of Arsenal and whose family have owned a stake in the club since before the second world war — her husband's grandfather, Sir Bracewell Smith, served as Arsenal's chairman — because she felt the views of her family were being under-represented.

"She always felt the club was being run for Fiszman," said a source. "Her family own nearly as much as him but she felt she was not being recognised in the way the club was run. She got fed up with that and they got fed up with her trying to exert her position — that she should be treated equally."

Richard Carr, also a club director and a descendent of Sir Bracewell Smith, ­controls 4.3% of Arsenal. Sarah Phipps-Bagge, Sir Bracewell Smith's grand-daughter owns 2%. There is a belief now that despite the family's loyalty to Arsenal, Lady Bracewell-Smith, who has no children of her own, will sell her stake at an instant profit in excess of £50m. But Bracewell-Smith added in HER SECRET DIARIES: "I've never had a thought of selling my Arsenal shares and I still don't."


Although the club's chairman, Peter Hill-Wood, said on Wednesday that the directors "are interested in buying more shares so the future stability of the club is secure" many close observers believe that is beyond the means of even the richest of them, the American billionaire Stan Kroenke. One interested party posited that instead Bracewell-Smith's departure is a ploy to create a market for shares.

If Bracewell-Smith sells — and Usmanov has not ruled out reigniting his interest in a takeover following this week's events — it would set a definitive price for Arsenal shares. However, the club laughed off the suggestion that there had been any motives quite as Machiavellian behind Wednesdayyesterday's fracture.

Arsenal fans will be reassured by the claims that Arsène Wenger takes no ­interest in events in the boardroom. ­However, the departure of Dein, who has only lately been replaced by the American Major League soccer executive Ivan Gazidis, has unquestionably inhibited Arsenal's ­activity in the transfer market.


Hers more info for you US USE IT WISELY GRASSHOPPER

[MutleyGooner]

stirring a
large cauldron which seemed to be full
of soup.
`There’s certainly too much pepper in
that soup!’ Alice said to herself, as well
as she could for sneezing.
There was certainly too much of it in
the air. Even the Duchess sneezed
occasionally; and as for the baby, it was
sneezing and howling alternately
without a moment’s pause. The only
things in the kitchen that did not sneeze,
were the cook, and a large cat which
was sitting on the hearth and grinning
from ear to ear.
`Please would you tell me,’ said Alice, a little timidly, for she was not quite sure whether it was good
manners for her to speak first, `why your cat grins like that?’
`It’s a Cheshire cat,’ said the Duchess, `and that’s why. Pig!’
She said the last word with such sudden violence that Alice quite jumped; but she saw in another
moment that it was addressed to the baby, and not to her, so she took courage, and went on again:–
`I didn’t know that Cheshire cats always grinned; in fact, I didn’t know that cats COULD grin.’
`They all can,’ said the Duchess; `and most of ‘em do.’
`I don’t know of any that do,’ Alice said very politely, feeling quite pleased to have got into a
conversation.
`You don’t know much,’ said the Duchess; `and that’s a fact.’
Alice did not at all like the tone of this remark, and thought it would be as well to introduce some
other subject of conversation. While she was trying to fix on one, the cook took the cauldron of soup
off the fire, and at once set to work throwing everything within her reach at the Duchess and the baby -
-the fire-irons came first; then followed a shower of saucepans, plates, and dishes. The Duchess took
no notice of them even when they hit her; and the baby was howling so much already, that it was quite
impossible to say whether the blows hurt it or not.

`Oh, PLEASE mind what you’re doing!’ cried Alice, jumping up and down in an agony of terror. `Oh,
there goes his PRECIOUS nose’; as an unusually large saucepan flew close by it, and very nearly
carried it off.
`If everybody minded their own business,’ the Duchess said in a hoarse growl, `the world would go
round a deal faster than it does.’
`Which would NOT be an advantage,’ said Alice, who felt very glad to get an opportunity of showing
off a little of her knowledge. `Just think of what work it would make with the day and night! You see
the earth takes twenty-four hours to turn round on its axis–’
`Talking of axes,’ said the Duchess, `chop off her head!’
Alice glanced rather anxiously at the cook, to see if she meant to take the hint; but the cook was busily
stirring the soup, and seemed not to be listening, so she went on again: `Twenty-four hours, I THINK;
or is it twelve? I–’
`Oh, don’t bother ME,’ said the Duchess; `I never could abide figures!’ And with that she began
nursing her child again, singing a sort of lullaby to it as she did so, and giving it a violent shake at the
end of every line:
`Speak roughly to your little boy,
And beat him when he sneezes:
He only does it to annoy,
Because he knows it teases.’
CHORUS.
(In which the cook and the baby joined):–
`Wow! wow! wow!’
While the Duchess sang the second verse of the song, she kept tossing the baby violently up and down,
and the poor little thing howled so, that Alice could hardly hear the words:–
`I speak severely to my boy,
I beat him when he sneezes;
For he can thoroughly enjoy
The pepper when he pleases!’
CHORUS.
`Wow! wow! wow!’
`Here! you may nurse it a bit, if you like!’ the Duchess said to Alice, flinging the baby at her as she
spoke. `I must go and get ready to play croquet with the Queen,’ and she hurried out of the room. The
cook threw a frying-pan after her as she went out, but it just missed her.
Alice caught the baby with some difficulty, as it was a queer- shaped little creature, and held out its
arms and legs in all directions, `just like a star-fish,’ thought Alice. The poor little thing was snorting
like a steam-engine when she caught it, and kept doubling itself up and straightening itself out again,
so that altogether, for the first minute or two, it was as much as she could do to hold it.
As soon as she had made out the proper way of nursing it, (which was to twist it up into a sort of knot,
and then keep tight hold of its right ear and left foot, so as to prevent its undoing itself,) she carried it
30
out into the open air. `IF I don’t take this child away with me,’ thought Alice, `they’re sure to kill it in a
day or two: wouldn’t it be murder to leave it behind?’ She said the last words out loud, and the little
thing grunted in reply (it had left off sneezing by this time). `Don’t grunt,’ said Alice; `that’s not at all a
proper way of expressing yourself.’
The baby grunted again, and Alice looked very anxiously into its face to see what was the matter with
it. There could be no doubt that it had a VERY turn-up nose, much more like a snout than a real nose;
also its eyes were getting extremely small for a baby: altogether Alice did not like the look of the thing
at all. `But perhaps it was only sobbing,’ she thought, and
looked into its eyes again, to see if there were any tears.
No, there were no tears. `If you’re going to turn into a pig,
my dear,’ said Alice, seriously, `I’ll have nothing more to do
with you. Mind now!’ The poor little thing sobbed again (or
grunted, it was impossible to say which), and they went on
for some while in silence.
Alice was just beginning to think to herself, `Now, what am
I to do with this creature when I get it home?’ when it
grunted again, so violently, that she looked down into its
face in some alarm. This time there could be NO mistake
about it: it was neither more nor less than a pig, and she felt
that it would be quite absurd for her to carry it further.
So she set the little creature down, and felt quite relieved to
see it trot away quietly into the wood. `If it had grown up,’
she said to herself, `it would have made a dreadfully ugly
child: but it makes rather a handsome pig, I think.’ And she
began thinking over other children she knew, who might do
very well as pigs, and was just saying to herself, `if one only knew the right way to change them–’
when she was a little startled by seeing the Cheshire Cat sitting on a bough of a tree a few yards off.
The Cat only grinned when it saw Alice. It looked good- natured, she thought: still it had VERY long
claws and a great many teeth, so she felt that it ought to be treated with respect.
`Cheshire Puss,’ she began, rather timidly, as she did not at all know whether it would like the name:
however, it only grinned a little wider. `Come, it’s pleased so far,’ thought Alice, and she went on.
`Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?’
`That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,’ said the Cat.
`I don’t much care where–’ said Alice.
`Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,’ said the Cat.
`–so long as I get SOMEWHERE,’ Alice added as an explanation.
`Oh, you’re sure to do that,’ said the Cat, `if you only walk long enough.’
Alice felt that this could not be denied, so she tried another question. `What sort of people live about
here?’
`In THAT direction,’ the Cat said, waving its right paw round, `lives a Hatter: and in THAT direction,’
waving the other paw, `lives a March Hare. Visit either you like: they’re both mad.’
31
But I don’t want to go among mad people,’ Alice
remarked.
`Oh, you can’t help that,’ said the Cat: `we’re all
mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.’
`How do you know I’m mad?’ said Alice.
`You must be,’ said the Cat, `or you wouldn’t
have come here.’
Alice didn’t think that proved it at all; however, she went on `And how do
you know that you’re mad?’
`To begin with,’ said the Cat, `a dog’s not mad. You grant that?’
`I suppose so,’ said Alice.
`Well, then,’ the Cat went on, `you see, a dog growls when it’s angry, and
wags its tail when it’s pleased. Now I growl when I’m pleased, and wag my
tail when I’m angry. Therefore I’m mad.’
`I call it purring, not growling,’ said Alice.
`Call it what you like,’ said the Cat. `Do you play croquet with the Queen
to-day?’
`I should like it very much,’ said Alice, `but I haven’t been invited yet.’
`You’ll see me there,’ said the Cat, and vanished.
Alice was not much surprised at this, she was getting so used to queer things happening. While she
was looking at the place where it had been, it suddenly appeared again.
`By-the-bye, what became of the baby?’ said the Cat. `I’d nearly forgotten to ask.’
`It turned into a pig,’ Alice quietly said, just as if it had come back in a natural way.
`I thought it would,’ said the Cat, and vanished again.
Alice waited a little, half expecting to see it again, but it did not appear, and after a minute or two she
walked on in the direction in which the March Hare was said to live. `I’ve seen hatters before,’ she said
to herself; `the March Hare will be much the most interesting, and perhaps as this is May it won’t be
raving mad–at least not so mad as it was in March.’ As she said this, she looked up, and there was the
Cat again, sitting on a branch of a tree.
`Did you say pig, or fig?’ said the Cat.
`I said pig,’ replied Alice; `and I wish you wouldn’t keep appearing and vanishing so suddenly: you
make one quite giddy.’
`All right,’ said the Cat; and this time it vanished quite slowly, beginning with the end of the tail, and
ending with the grin, which remained some time after the rest of it had gone.
32
`Well! I’ve often seen a cat without a grin,’ thought Alice; `but a grin without a cat! It’s the most
curious thing I ever say in my life!’
She had not gone much farther before she came in sight of the house of the March Hare: she thought it
must be the right house, because the chimneys were shaped like ears and the roof was thatched with
fur. It was so large a house, that she did not like to go nearer till she had nibbled some more of the
lefthand bit of mushroom, and raised herself to about two feet high: even then she walked up towards
it rather timidly, saying to herself `Suppose it should be raving mad after all! I almost wish I’d gone to
see the Hatter instead!’
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Chapter VII: A Mad Tea-Party
There was a table set out under a tree in front of the house, and the March Hare and the Hatter were
having tea at it: a Dormouse was sitting between them, fast asleep, and the other two were using it as a
cushion, resting their elbows on it, and the talking over its head. `Very uncomfortable for the
Dormouse,’ thought Alice; `only, as it’s asleep, I suppose it doesn’t mind.’
The table was a large one, but the three were all crowded together at one corner of it: `No room! No
room!’ they cried out when they saw Alice coming. `There’s PLENTY of room!’ said Alice
indignantly, and she sat down in a large arm-chair at one end of the table.
`Have some wine,’ the March Hare said in an encouraging tone.
Alice looked all round the table, but there was nothing on it but tea. `I don’t see any wine,’ she
remarked.
`There isn’t any,’ said the March Hare.
`Then it wasn’t very civil of you to offer it,’ said Alice angrily.
`It wasn’t very civil of you to sit down without being invited,’ said the March Hare.
`I didn’t know it was YOUR table,’ said Alice; `it’s laid for a great many more than three.’
`Your hair wants cutting,’ said the Hatter. He had been looking at Alice for some time with great
curiosity, and this was his first speech.
`You should learn not to make personal remarks,’ Alice said with some severity; `it’s very rude.’
The Hatter opened his eyes very wide on hearing this; but all he SAID was, `Why is a raven like a
writing-desk?’
`Come, we shall have some fun now!’ thought Alice. `I’m glad they’ve begun asking riddles.–I believe
I can guess that,’ she added aloud.
`Do you mean that you think you can find out the answer to it?’ said the March Hare.
`Exactly so,’ said Alice.
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`Then you should say what you mean,’ the March Hare went on.
`I do,’ Alice hastily replied; `at least–at least I mean what I say–that’s the same thing, you know.’
`Not the same thing a bit!’ said the Hatter. `You might just as well say that “I see what I eatâ€