Cricket For Dummies

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pixie
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Cricket For Dummies

Post by pixie »

In preparation for the Ashes this summer against Australia, this demonstrates how simple the rules of cricket really are:

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in.

Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out.

When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side thats been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out.

Sometimes you get men still in and not out.

When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in.

There are two men called umpires who stay out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out.

When both sides have been in and all the men are out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game!.
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corkbarry
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Post by corkbarry »

Explain that again :lol:

What happens if it rains? Why do they stop for lunch and tea? why do they break for drinks? why are they wearing pyjamas.
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projoe
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Post by projoe »

you forgot to explain the 'Duckworth Lewis Method' :wink:

good luck :lol:
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g88ner
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Post by g88ner »

projoe wrote:you forgot to explain the 'Duckworth Lewis Method' :wink:

good luck :lol:
A quick run down of the LBW rule when bowling round the wicket would probably be beneficial, too.

After all, I'm sure Gusher and out american friends are well and truely stumped at the rules of this wonderful game! :D
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corkbarry
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Post by corkbarry »

A strange Game where you can bowl a Maiden over and have a full toss and not get Jail :oops:
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NBM
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Post by NBM »

Might have my first net session tomorrow night, could be entertaining! :lol:
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Charlie! Charlie!
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Post by Charlie! Charlie! »

NBM wrote:Might have my first net session tomorrow night, could be entertaining! :lol:
first ever? :shock:
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olgitgooner
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Post by olgitgooner »

In the old days, BOTH teams wore white.

How the fuck were you supposed to know which side has scored some goals?!!!!
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NBM
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Post by NBM »

Charlie! Charlie! wrote:
NBM wrote:Might have my first net session tomorrow night, could be entertaining! :lol:
first ever? :shock:
Yeah, never played cricket at school (my school was crap). Only cricket experience is thrashing a tennis ball bowled underarm about a beach on holiday. :lol:
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SPUDMASHER
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Post by SPUDMASHER »

I'm surprised that the septics don't like it TBH. It is a game that is stacked full of stats. Surely that's what they live for. :shock:

I like going over to Chelmsford once a year or so and enjoying a days play. It's seriously relaxing. A few tins, cucumber sandwiches, deck chair and a days cricket. What more could you ask for.

Having said that, I'd swap it for 3 minutes inside Kelly Brook and the rest of the day up to my armpits in runny shite. :lol: :wink:
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flash gunner
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Post by flash gunner »

SPUDMASHER wrote:I'm surprised that the septics don't like it TBH. It is a game that is stacked full of stats. Surely that's what they live for. :shock:

I like going over to Chelmsford once a year or so and enjoying a days play. It's seriously relaxing. A few tins, cucumber sandwiches, deck chair and a days cricket. What more could you ask for.

Having said that, I'd swap it for 3 minutes inside Kelly Brook and the rest of the day up to my armpits in runny shite. :lol: :wink:
3 minutes? You gonna fuck her twice then? :wink: :lol:
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NBM
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Post by NBM »

flash gunner wrote:
SPUDMASHER wrote:I'm surprised that the septics don't like it TBH. It is a game that is stacked full of stats. Surely that's what they live for. :shock:

I like going over to Chelmsford once a year or so and enjoying a days play. It's seriously relaxing. A few tins, cucumber sandwiches, deck chair and a days cricket. What more could you ask for.

Having said that, I'd swap it for 3 minutes inside Kelly Brook and the rest of the day up to my armpits in runny shite. :lol: :wink:
3 minutes? You gonna fuck her twice then? :wink: :lol:
And have a snooze in between goes! :lol:
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gusher311
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Post by gusher311 »

SPUDMASHER wrote:I'm surprised that the septics don't like it TBH. It is a game that is stacked full of stats. Surely that's what they live for. :shock:

I like going over to Chelmsford once a year or so and enjoying a days play. It's seriously relaxing. A few tins, cucumber sandwiches, deck chair and a days cricket. What more could you ask for.

Having said that, I'd swap it for 3 minutes inside Kelly Brook and the rest of the day up to my armpits in runny shite. :lol: :wink:


We have baseball. No need for cricket. :-P
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mcdowell42
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Post by mcdowell42 »

gusher311 wrote:
SPUDMASHER wrote:I'm surprised that the septics don't like it TBH. It is a game that is stacked full of stats. Surely that's what they live for. :shock:

I like going over to Chelmsford once a year or so and enjoying a days play. It's seriously relaxing. A few tins, cucumber sandwiches, deck chair and a days cricket. What more could you ask for.

Having said that, I'd swap it for 3 minutes inside Kelly Brook and the rest of the day up to my armpits in runny shite. :lol: :wink:


We have baseball. No need for cricket. :-P

Oh yeah the world series which nobody outside of america competes in. :wink: :wink:
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gusher311
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Post by gusher311 »

mcdowell42 wrote:
gusher311 wrote:
SPUDMASHER wrote:I'm surprised that the septics don't like it TBH. It is a game that is stacked full of stats. Surely that's what they live for. :shock:

I like going over to Chelmsford once a year or so and enjoying a days play. It's seriously relaxing. A few tins, cucumber sandwiches, deck chair and a days cricket. What more could you ask for.

Having said that, I'd swap it for 3 minutes inside Kelly Brook and the rest of the day up to my armpits in runny shite. :lol: :wink:


We have baseball. No need for cricket. :-P


Oh yeah the world series which nobody outside of america competes in. :wink: :wink:

That's because we are the world :wink: :wink:
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