JOKE OF THE DAY

Post by **I Hate Hleb** » Mon Oct 29, 2007 2:35 am

HEARD THIS ON BBC2 BEFORE THE M.O.T.D. HIGHLIGHTS AND THOUGHT IT WAS HILARIOUS:

DANIEL LEVY SEES AN OLD LADY WITH TWO HEAVY SHOPPING BAGS STRUGGLING TO GET ACROSS A BUSY ROAD. HE GOES UP THE WOMAN AND ASKS 'CAN YOU MANAGE DEAR?'

TO WHICH THE OLD LADY SAYS, 'YES, BUT EVEN I'M NOT INTERESTED IN MANAGING THAT PILE OF SHIT!!'

jesper arnsbjerg · Post by **jesper arnsbjerg** » Mon Oct 29, 2007 6:50 am

Also a good one in the sun today
Don`t let Tottenham take your dog for a walk, they can not hold on to a lead.

Post by **Dicko** » Mon Oct 29, 2007 8:23 pm

my version was She replies "Fuckoff, I don't want the job!"

Post by **I Hate Hleb** » Mon Oct 29, 2007 9:38 pm

BUT I'M OBVIOUSLY NOT AS RUDE AS YOU ARE DICKO!

A LADY SHOULDN'T BE USING THE 'F' WORD - EXCEPT FOR IN THE BEDROOM, OBVIOUSLY!

Post by **REB** » Mon Oct 29, 2007 9:41 pm

I Hate Hleb wrote:BUT I'M OBVIOUSLY NOT AS RUDE AS YOU ARE DICKO! A LADY SHOULDN'T BE USING THE 'F' WORD - EXCEPT FOR IN THE BEDROOM, OBVIOUSLY!

surprised she didnt edit it

Post by **Dicko** » Mon Oct 29, 2007 9:52 pm

When I say my version I mean the one that my friend got by text whilst we were on the coach yesterday. She forwarded it to me.

Wayno · Post by **Wayno** » Mon Oct 29, 2007 9:56 pm

Dicko wrote:When I say my version I mean the one that my friend got by text whilst we were on the coach yesterday. She forwarded it to me.

Imaginary friends are cool, me and Jimi Hendrix played Kerplunk last night, Jimi won 3 games to one......Cunting Bastardhole

U.F.G Anfield '89 · Post by **U.F.G Anfield '89** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 12:22 am

you challenged jimmy to kerplunk, with his manual dexterity are you mental? he could have beaten you with his teeth alone!

play to your strengths, i'll give einstein a game of darts but one beating at chess was enough thank you very much.

RaM · Post by **RaM** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 6:41 am

Couple of good jokes I heard today:

1. An Aborigine walks into a brothel. One of the workers asks him: "Hand or head job?". He replied: "Nah, no job."

2. Three ducks were in a pond, with their heads submerged. A man walking by asked the first duck what it was doing. "Blowing bubbles" the duck replied. When the man asked the second duck, he got the same answer. When he asked the third duck, he changed his question slightly, saying: "What are you doing? Let me guess, blowing bubbles." The third duck replied saying "No! I am bubbles."

Wayno · Post by **Wayno** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 9:45 am

Good old Lazy Abo's, still why should they work, it's their country

Post by **REB** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 10:23 am

Wayno wrote:Good old Lazy Abo's, still why should they work, it's their country

yeah ram

bloody irish convicts

Wayno · Post by **Wayno** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 10:41 am

Just kidding with you RaM, I love your country

RaM · Post by **RaM** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 12:21 pm

Good to know.

The Irish convicts built the country rebel.

Post by **I Hate Hleb** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 2:57 pm

U.F.G Anfield '89 wrote:you challenged jimmy to kerplunk, with his manual dexterity are you mental? he could have beaten you with his teeth alone!

play to your strengths, i'll give einstein a game of darts but one beating at chess was enough thank you very much.

NICE TO SEE YOU ON TOP FORM AGAIN U.F.G.

U.F.G Anfield '89 · Post by **U.F.G Anfield '89** » Tue Oct 30, 2007 5:26 pm

Cheers Hlebby, i do what i can.

so anyway a bloke is going through Australian customs and the customs official says to him "Do you have a criminal record?" the bloke says "No, Why? do you still need one to get in?"

sorry RaM, couldn't resist.