Any Ideas

gunner · Post by **gunner** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:34 am

Right give me any ideas how i can disappear to London for a day to soak up the atmosphere without the missus finding out i have disappeared.. All answers welcome ..As were gonna smash Hull 3-0

northbank123 · Post by **northbank123** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:44 am

I thought you were gutted you could never get to games as the cost and effort of travel was prohibitive? Just my view but if I was you I'd rather spend the money and incur the hassle to actually go to a game.

Post by **SPUDMASHER** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:46 am

Tell her that you have an appointment at the clap clinic. If you're like most of the blokes on here you'll have no trouble convincing her.

Failing that just suck it up and tell her that you're going to London to take in the atmosphere of an Arsenal FA cup Final. If she doesn't like it then tell her that she doesn't need to be there when you get back if she doesn't want to be. You'll still have Arsenal and DB10 will be able to show you many different ways of wanking to satisfy the other half of your life.

mcdowell42 · Post by **mcdowell42** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:47 am

Seriously

gunner · Post by **gunner** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:48 am

northbank123 wrote:I thought you were gutted you could never get to games as the cost and effort of travel was prohibitive? Just my view but if I was you I'd rather spend the money and incur the hassle to actually go to a game.

Hence that's why i said soak up the atmosphere as i cannot afford a ticket.. But like i said any ideas how i can try and pull it off.. so i can try and pull a fast one..

mcdowell42 · Post by **mcdowell42** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:50 am

Are u on the wind up

gunner · Post by **gunner** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:51 am

SPUDMASHER wrote:Tell her that you have an appointment at the clap clinic. If you're like most of the blokes on here you'll have no trouble convincing her.

Failing that just suck it up and tell her that you're going to London to take in the atmosphere of an Arsenal FA cup Final. If she doesn't like it then tell her that she doesn't need to be there when you get back if she doesn't want to be. You'll still have Arsenal and DB10 will be able to show you many different ways of wanking to satisfy the other half of your life.

Hmm.. Think i will pass on that one.. Any more ideas lol

gunner · Post by **gunner** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:53 am

mcdowell42 wrote:Are u on the wind up

wind up... ?

Mate she's a nightmare .. Totally hates the game she thinks all football is trouble ..

northbank123 · Post by **northbank123** » Thu May 15, 2014 7:59 am

gunner wrote:
northbank123 wrote:I thought you were gutted you could never get to games as the cost and effort of travel was prohibitive? Just my view but if I was you I'd rather spend the money and incur the hassle to actually go to a game.
Hence that's why i said soak up the atmosphere as i cannot afford a ticket.. But like i said any ideas how i can try and pull it off.. so i can try and pull a fast one..

I'm not on about spunking a grand on a tout. But you make out like it's nigh-on impossible to get down from York to watch Arsenal which is a source of deep regret for you, yet you'll come down when you're not even going to a game?

The pubs around N5 are all ticket-only or get there early doors - in which case you'll end up spending far more on booze than you would on a Cat C ticket for a game next season. All I'm saying is I'm a bit puzzled you're so gutted it's impossible for you to go to any games but you'll come down to London for this...

gunner · Post by **gunner** » Thu May 15, 2014 8:06 am

northbank123 wrote:
gunner wrote:
northbank123 wrote:I thought you were gutted you could never get to games as the cost and effort of travel was prohibitive? Just my view but if I was you I'd rather spend the money and incur the hassle to actually go to a game.
Hence that's why i said soak up the atmosphere as i cannot afford a ticket.. But like i said any ideas how i can try and pull it off.. so i can try and pull a fast one..
I'm not on about spunking a grand on a tout. But you make out like it's nigh-on impossible to get down from York to watch Arsenal which is a source of deep regret for you, yet you'll come down when you're not even going to a game?

The pubs around N5 are all ticket-only or get there early doors - in which case you'll end up spending far more on booze than you would on a Cat C ticket for a game next season. All I'm saying is I'm a bit puzzled you're so gutted it's impossible for you to go to any games but you'll come down to London for this...

I watch them all the time on my TV .. I would like to just break loose from the norm. Hence I would love to get there and watch the game with a load of gooners.. sounds like your giving me a hard time and i only asked for suggestions to see if anything would be plausible. Thanks for your comment very much appreciated, but puzzled that you haven't clearly read my post. which was headed Any Ideas.

northbank123 · Post by **northbank123** » Thu May 15, 2014 10:56 am

I'm not trying to have a pop mate, it's just that you've made out it's practically impossible for you to go to any games with your circumstances and living in York but travelling down Saturday would be just as inconvenient and costly as going to a home game?

I'm certainly not judging you for not going to games, just an observation that's all.

OneBardGooner · Post by **OneBardGooner** » Thu May 15, 2014 11:56 am

gunner wrote:Right give me any ideas how i can disappear to London for a day to soak up the atmosphere without the missus finding out i have disappeared.. All answers welcome ..As were gonna smash Hull 3-0

Easy peasy dude !

Hide behind a door and when she comes in You knock her out - club/drugs/any other means that don't kill....tie her up to a radiator - leave her with enough drink and food...then when you get home - walk in and with a very convincing look of utter horror ans shock on yer boat race - Say "My darling Who Could have done this!?"

And once you untied her - explain you banged your head and have only just remembered who you are where you live etc...buy her some flowers and she'll believe you!...etc etc

See! tld you easy peasy.

Well it worked for another Gooner who used to come on here...okay so he's doing 8 - 10 for assault, kidnapping and something else....but had he NOT crumbled and admitted his guilt he wouold still be free!

Sorrrted.

northbank123 · Post by **northbank123** » Thu May 15, 2014 12:16 pm

Donkey punch

clockender1 · Post by **clockender1** » Thu May 15, 2014 12:19 pm

Tell her you have an old mate in the hospital who might not make it, and you'd like to see him one last time.

She'd have to be a heartless bitch not to let you go.

If she asks his name , it's Arsene Wenger...

gunner · Post by **gunner** » Thu May 15, 2014 12:20 pm

OneBardGooner wrote:
gunner wrote:Right give me any ideas how i can disappear to London for a day to soak up the atmosphere without the missus finding out i have disappeared.. All answers welcome ..As were gonna smash Hull 3-0

Easy peasy dude !

Hide behind a door and when she comes in You knock her out - club/drugs/any other means that don't kill....tie her up to a radiator - leave her with enough drink and food...then when you get home - walk in and with a very convincing look of utter horror ans shock on yer boat race - Say "My darling Who Could have done this!?"

And once you untied her - explain you banged your head and have only just remembered who you are where you live etc...buy her some flowers and she'll believe you!...etc etc

See! tld you easy peasy.

Ha ha best idea i have heard that explanation should be made into a comedy sketch .. Thanks amazon here i come for the bat ..

Cheers

Well it worked for another Gooner who used to come on here...okay so he's doing 8 - 10 for assault, kidnapping and something else....but had he NOT crumbled and admitted his guilt he wouold still be free!

Sorrrted.

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