I'm back.
Not dead (thankfully) not "taken" by aliens (or Gus
) not a spud ( 
).Sorry to have worried so many of the regulars but I have to say I'm genuinely touched (No - not like that
) by the response to my "disapearance" and by the amount of posts wishing me well and hoping I was ok. So, seriously guys; THANK YOU. 
So, you ask, what happened?
Firstly, I made it to the Derby thrashing ok. Great result, had a blast with Fordy, my bro Wayne and Gooner mate Emma and honorary Gooner Graham (from Sheffield, Sheff Wed fan, but lives in London so adopted The Arse as 2nd team
).Was in the Pins before game with big DB10GOONER on back of Jersey. Met no one off forum (
) until after match when I had a nice chat with Gooner Ed outside the stadium. Spent evening in Arsenal Tavern and then every single bar in Church Street!! 
Got a nice lock in until 5am Sunday morning due to fact Emma is Oirish and knew the Oirish owner of one of those Church Street bars... LyingAir (sorry - RyanAir) then treated me to the flight from hell home on the Sunday - MASSIVE turbulence, air hostesses strapped into seats for duration so NO ALCOHOL
served on board flying coffin, relieved applause upon "landing" (if you can call slamming plane into runway so hard the fucker bounces , a landing 
) and then sitting on runway for nearly an hour for totally unspecified and unexplained reason... Woke up Monday morning with bad back pain which promptly turned into a full-on muscle spasm that hurled me across the bedroom in agony (imagine the worst cramp you ever had, multiply by a thousand and make the fucker non stop and you'll get the idea).
So, basically, I've been in bed on valium and codiene for the last three weeks more or less. And just to cap it all off my fucking broadband at home got chopped off by some knob ends upgrading cables and shit on my road.
Anyway, I'm back, I missed you guys big time and, once more, thank you for your concern.
EVEN WORSE, SOMEONE SUGGESTED THAT YOU HAD DESERTED US FOR ANOTHER FORUM! 
