Jokes

LeftfootlegendGooner · Thu Jul 14, 2011 10:37 am

DB10GOONER wrote:LeftfootlegendGooner wrote: So the beckhams have named their daughter Harper Seven?
Last time i heard that was when a bloke with a hairlip told me the time.

FINALLY! And it might be offensive to some. Result. Well played Lefty.

Cheers DB, "it's just the kind of guy I am" (dear john) :)

Rugby Gooner · Post by **Rugby Gooner** » Fri Jul 15, 2011 7:41 pm

What goes, "Mark,Mark,Mark."?
A dog with a hairlip.

Palestinian Gooner · Post by **Palestinian Gooner** » Sat Jul 16, 2011 4:02 am

Who runs faster than Usain Bolt with a stolen tv?
- A somali with the dvd-player.

LeftfootlegendGooner · Wed Jul 20, 2011 11:11 am

Priest asks the pope "when is it ok to have sex with young boys?" Pope says "it's legal once they've left school."
Priest says "Roll on 4 o'clock!"

TheCook · Post by **TheCook** » Wed Jul 20, 2011 1:16 pm

I thought I saw the ghost of Gloria Gaynor the other night.

First I was afraid.........

LeftfootlegendGooner · Thu Jul 21, 2011 11:34 am

I was driving past a field today when I saw a scarecrow trying to have a *****!!! I thought to myself, "That poor bastard's just clutching at straws!"

bang goes the 0-0 draw · Thu Jul 21, 2011 3:13 pm

My wife is leaving me as she says i'm obsessed with firearms.

So I set her arms on fire

SC1793 · Post by **SC1793** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 6:54 pm

Breaking News: Tottenham sign Grabatelli on a free

TeeCee · Post by **TeeCee** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 8:26 pm

Ngongo Mwambi has to travel 5 miles every day for fresh water and 7 miles for food.........................

.......... This is because the daft *word censored* torched Peckham Spar and KFC and now has to walk to Croydon for breakfast!

augie · Post by **augie** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 8:53 pm

Breaking News : Tottenham FC has been burnt to the ground.......police suspect arsene

marcengels · Post by **marcengels** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 8:57 pm

augie wrote:Breaking News : Tottenham FC has been burnt to the ground.......police suspect arsene

I don't know why but...

TeeCee · Post by **TeeCee** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 9:02 pm

BREAKING NEWS: Youths in Brighton smashing back doors in!!

But still no sign of any riots..

scfc64 · Post by **scfc64** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 9:09 pm

Its a scene of utter devastation outside my house tonght. Cars upside down on their roofs burning,next door has had the garden wall smashed down,their front doorway has gone too. The Police are all over the place,Firemen trying to put out the flames,its not good.

Anyway,I've told the wife that next time let me park the car.

scfc64 · Post by **scfc64** » Tue Aug 09, 2011 9:19 pm

TeeCee wrote:BREAKING NEWS: Youths in Brighton smashing back doors in!!

But still no sign of any riots..

Chunky The Gooner · Post by **Chunky The Gooner** » Wed Aug 10, 2011 2:50 pm

Bad News

The rioting has spread to Ireland. Paddy has just smashed his
laptop screen, after trying to loot Ebay