The online gooners first fully anonymous confession thread

As we're unlikely to see terraces again at football, this is the virtual equivalent where you can chat to your hearts content about all football matters and, obviously, Arsenal in particular. This forum encourages all Gooners to visit and contribute so please keep it respectful, clean and topical.
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safcftm
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Post by safcftm »

scfc64 wrote:Dear Mr Sunderland man,
Did you see Corrie tonight ? If so,where my eyes deceiving me or was that Kevin Webster servicing a 13 year old Escort in his garage?
Fucking hell, it started as a confession thread and its going to end up as a Dear Deidre column :wink:

northbankbren
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Post by northbankbren »

can i confess openly....that sometimes, just sometimes....I......

northbankbren
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Post by northbankbren »

stay up too late, and regret it in the morning. :wink:

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SPUDMASHER
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Post by SPUDMASHER »

DB10GOONER wrote:
Percy Dalton wrote:I fucked DB10's missus!

It was a huge mistake and it was heartbreaking for her knowing that the 56th time was the last and that she had to go back to small portions again!

I had to end it when she became obsessed by her husbands lies about fucking English women and how upset she got about his obvious lack of height, ability and looks to do this.

She wanted to runaway with the circus but it was clear he was more suited and his grape juggling act was well known and would be the main bread winner......that and tarmacing!

8)
:lol:

Sorry, Chubbsy - would never happen. The woman is used to the best. How could she go from my Rolls Royce-style loving to your Fiat Uno-style *premature ejaculating micro-cock? :lol:




*Yep, your Doris told Spuddy and me all about it. At least that's what I think she said - Spuddy was nuts deep in her throat at the time! :barscarf:
I remember that night! :barscarf: :barscarf:

What was particularly impressive was that I went in through her arse but still got nuts deep in her throat. What a game girl she is :lol: :lol:

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scfc64
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Post by scfc64 »

safcftm wrote:
scfc64 wrote:Dear Mr Sunderland man,
Did you see Corrie tonight ? If so,where my eyes deceiving me or was that Kevin Webster servicing a 13 year old Escort in his garage?
Fucking hell, it started as a confession thread and its going to end up as a Dear Deidre column :wink:
I'm sorry,I know its not a Dear Deidre thead and it has been quite funny. BTW,Kevin was down in the dumps,but now he's feeling Rosie. :oops: :oops: :wink: !

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digger
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Post by digger »

safcftm wrote:The latest confessions are in. These good souls have now been cleansed:


I'll bet thats a weight off your shoulders, you can now feel free from trouble. Keep the confessions coming lads, tell the online gooners your worries and sins
I live in a flat and my next door neighbour has a beautiful wife. Whenever they have sex I lie in my bed with my ear to the wall listening and ***** wishing I was fucking her. I have stolen her underwear from the washing line before and I sniff it even though I know its clean
This is my favourite one by far, fucking brilliant :lol:

(btw, not me, my next door neighbour is 97 :lol: )

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safcftm
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Post by safcftm »

havent checked the inbox for a few days but had another couple of confessions. Firstly:
it would not bother me if we signed huth and shawcross as this would add steel to our awful back-line. i know everyone will say they would rather get relegated than have them,but to me we would get results with them two in our team and winning is everthing,now more than ever. my old man even came around (a little) to the idea and he hates them more than anyone i know,sorry guys.
and then
once i had a friend round when i was younger and we discussed wanking. We ended up wanking together in my bedroom. Neither of us are gay but we thought we'd try it. Neither of us have told anyone about it until now
Probably best to keep it that way my child, some people might be wholly unreasonable and count it as being, well, just a little bit gay!

You have both been cleansed!

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DB10GOONER
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Post by DB10GOONER »

safcftm wrote:another confession arrives
Hey buddy, here's mine:

- I always admired Schmeichel, and he is actually the best keeper I've ever seen. I think he was way better than Seaman.

- I never watch our matches at Old Trafford. I hate losing to those bastards and since that's what always happens, I'd just rather watch a movie and look at the result afterwards.

- I'm an atheist and sincerely believe that religion is the biggest cancer of modern society.

- I don't find Shakira, Jennifer Lopez or Halle Berry attractive at all. I'd rather ***** one at home.

- DB10Gooner wants desperatly to have sex with me, but I've told him countless time to stop being so fucking gay. The twat just won't listen! What should I do, father?

There, I feel so much better :)

Cheers,
Well, my son, if you dont find Shakira, Jennifer Lopez or Halle Berry attractive at all, I suggest you stop denying DB10 his intimacy and embrace his loving. I have a funny feeling you'd enjoy it. :wink:
I can't believe Basil wrote in! :shock: I might have to drop her... :(


:wink:

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safcftm
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Post by safcftm »

Hadn't checked my confessions email box for a few days, but we have had another entry:
ok. i am after advice more than confession, happily married but bored guy is left on his own in the house and logs onto a dating
site, looks around and see loads of married bored women, for a laugh i sign up for a month to see if it is poss to get sex from this site, this goes on for a few days and nothing happens until i start a text chat with a seperated women about two hours down the road, not being dumb i am not using my name, real job or any other details with her, we swop pics and mobi numbers just to see what each other look like AND IT HAS SNOWBALLED. She has a kid and does not want a relationship and i now have the very real chance of some no strings fun, she has invited me to her house.........and i am sorely tempted, I could get away with this because i am regularly away from home, even the moblie number i used is disposable..... I CANT GET CAUGHT, SHE JUST WANTS A BOOTY CALL
give me some advice boys
Hmm, well my son, I think it is important to consider the commitment we make to our partners when we exchange the holy vows of marriage. Granted, you may well be able to perform the deed without being caught but the fact is you will know yourself that you have been unfaithful. This means that, when weighing up your situation, I would have to advise that you drive down there and give the bird a fucking good shagging, up the arse if possible, and then write back to confess your sin, let us know how it went and we can cleanse you, thus leaving you with a clear conscience

rodders1
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Post by rodders1 »

you will wake up in a bath full of ice with no kidneys....

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safcftm
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Post by safcftm »

rodders1 wrote:you will wake up in a bath full of ice with no kidneys....
Hmm, not a big fan of baths full of ice tbh, always found them a bit cold and they make me cock get small. Although it'd be mint if there were loads of bottles of beer in the bath along with the ice, could have plenty cold drinks. Would probably need a dialysis machine as well like

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Percy Dalton
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Post by Percy Dalton »

Have you checked the inbox today?

I do hope there is a new confession.

8)

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SPUDMASHER
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Post by SPUDMASHER »

so who have you stitched up then :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


just in case it is me you are a Shane Ritchie look alike *word censored* :lol:

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Percy Dalton
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Post by Percy Dalton »

SPUDMASHER wrote:so who have you stitched up then :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:


just in case it is me you are a Shane Ritchie look alike c**t :lol:
Me, stich someone up!

On the subject of lookalikes, have you found a 'Barker' to complete your Two Ronnies tribute act?

:lol:

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I Hate Hleb
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Post by I Hate Hleb »

Is Spuddy looking for a dog? :? :? :lol: :lol: :wink:

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